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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Texas lawman final exam |
| 2024-04-22 |
| Subject: Texas lawman final exam A young Texan grew up wanting to be a lawman. He grew up big - 6' 2", strong as a longhorn, and fast as a mustang. He could shoot a bottle cap tossed in the air at 40 paces. When he finally came of age, he applied to where he had only dreamed of working: the West Texas Sheriff's Department. After a series of tests and interviews, the Chief Deputy finally called him into his office for the young man's last interview. The Chief Deputy said: "You're a big strong kid and you can really shoot. So far your qualifications all look good, but we have, what you might call, an ‘Attitude Suitability Test’ that you must take before you can be accepted. We just don't let anyone carry our badge, son.” Then, sliding a .40 Caliber Sig Sauer P-229 service pistol and a box of ammo across the desk, the Chief said, "Take this pistol and go out and shoot: one illegal alien, one lawyer, one meth dealer, one pedophile, one Muslim extremist, one Progressive Activist Democrat, and a rabbit." "Why the rabbit?" queried the applicant. "You pass," said the Chief Deputy. "When can you start?" |
| Posted by:Besoeker |
| #2 heh. so it's gonna be that kind of morning, hey? |
| Posted by: Angerong Johnson8435 2024-04-22 09:56 |
| #1 A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas , and talked with an old rancher. He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher said, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there.", as he pointed out the location. The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me !" Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher. "See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land! No questions asked! Do you understand ?!!" The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores. A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull...... With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified. The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs..... "Your badge, show him your BADGE!!" |
| Posted by: Beldar+Uneter3543 2024-04-22 00:32 |