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Armed Dophins Escape (Anglo-ChiCom tin-foilery)
It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico. Experts who have studied the US navy's cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying "toxic dart" guns. Who are these experts and what evidence is there that the critters were trained to use such devices? Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet's smartest. The US navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing. Yes, they might be expected not to confirm this if it isn't true. Dolphins have been trained in attack-and-kill missions since the Cold War. .....and we know this because.... The US Atlantic bottlenose dolphins have apparently been taught to shoot terrorists attacking military vessels. We can always hope. Being smart, they might have just cooked up the idea on their own, like when Geraldo Rivera promised to personally shoot Osama bin Laden if he ran across him in Afghanistan. Their coastal compound was breached during the storm, sweeping them out to sea. But those who have studied the controversial use of dolphins in the US defence programme claim it is vital they are caught quickly. Leo Sheridan, 72, a respected accident investigator who has worked for government and industry, said he had received intelligence from sources close to the US government's marine fisheries service confirming dolphins had escaped. Why is Sheridan the only one who knows this? "My concern is that they have learnt to shoot at divers in wetsuits who have simulated terrorists in exercises." If divers or windsurfers are mistaken for a spy or suicide bomber and if equipped with special harnesses carrying toxic darts, they could fire," he said. "The darts are designed to put the target to sleep so they can be interrogated later, but what happens if the victim is not found for hours?" Usually dolphins were controlled via signals transmitted through a neck harness. "The question is, were these dolphins made secure before Katrina struck?" said Sheridan. The mystery surfaced when a separate group of dolphins was washed from a commercial oceanarium on the Mississippi coast during Katrina. This story apparently originated in the Observer and has been thoroughly debunked at the Museum of Hoaxes, which calls Sheridan "The Observer's crackpot on call." He has commented for them on other dolphin incidents, crop circles, and the 1941 plane crash that killed British aviator Amy Johnson (a conspiracy naturally). Posted by: Clock Phoger6260 2005-10-03 |
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