|
Beagle Wonât Bark (another kill for the Martian Defense Force)
Scientists have ruled out two possible explanations for their inability to pick up signals from Europeâs Beagle 2 Mars probe and discovered another â a large crater where the vessel was supposed to land.
| Y'know, if that crater wasn't there before it landed... ummm... |
The European team has received no transmissions from the craft, which was supposed to touch down on the distant planet on Christmas Day to begin its search for Martian life. NASAâs orbiting Mars Odyssey has passed five times over the spot where scientists hope Beagle landed, without picking up a signal. The latest attempt, between 0741 and 0901 GMT Monday, failed to pick up a bark from Beagle. Chief Beagle scientist Colin Pillinger said at a news conference that the team had received a new, detailed picture of the area where they believe the Beagle landed. While they cannot make out the ship itself, the image shows a 1 km (0.62 mile) wide crater at the center of the 70 by 10 km (43.5 by 6 mile) target area near the Martian equator, Pillinger said. It is possible, although unlikely, that the Beagle may be unable to communicate because it landed in the crater, he said. "This would be an incredibly unlucky situation," he said.
| Or because it made the crater, which'd be even unluckier... |
Scientists have ruled out two other possible causes for the failure, mission manager Mark Sims said. Neither the Martian weather nor trouble with the hardware of the Beagleâs clock appeared to be the source of the problem, he said. The vessel is programmed to transmit its signal when its orbiter or telescopes on earth are in position to receive it. If the clock had been damaged, the Beagle could have been "talking" and staying quiet at the wrong times. Sims said a problem with the clockâs software was still possible. The team planned to send the clock a reset command Wednesday. Lord Sainsbury, Britainâs science minister, said the government remained committed to unmanned space exploration and did not consider the mission a failure.
| You shot a few million into the cosmos and it went "splat." How is that not a failure? |
"Weâve always recognized that Beagle 2 was a high risk project," he said. "We must in future resist the temptation only to do low-risk projects... Long term, we need to be working with the European Space Agency to ensure that in some form there is a Beagle 3."
| Maybe the next one should be armed? |
Scientists at Britainâs National Space Center in central England are studying a functioning scale model of Beagle to work out what might have gone wrong. "They are keeping up their spirits," said Peter Barratt, spokesman for the British governmentâs physics and astronomy research agency.
| Somebody sent out for gin, huh? |
Project leaders say the Beagleâs mother ship, Mars Express, will offer the best hope of contacting the probe when its enters a lower orbit of the planet on Jan. 4. "That was always the prime chance for communication," Barratt said. "But if we get negative responses after a few tries, we will start to become concerned."
"Captain Skzgx! It looks like the mother ship is preparing to land!"
"Prepare to engage, Mr. Glpzzz!" |
Mars Express, which carried Beagle into space and set it free more than a week ago, is currently orbiting the planet as high as 188,000 kilometers (117,00 miles) above its equator.
"They're looking at us, Councilor Murblx!"
"I know, Captain Skzgx. What do they want?"
"Who can tell, sir? They're... alien!"
"Well, we can't take chances. Mars must be protected. Have your men bring up the zong ray!" |
On Tuesday, European Space Agency scientists at mission control in Darmstadt, Germany, will fire Mars Expressâ engine in an attempt to shift its orbit. They hope to move it over one of the Martian poles â necessary for it to survey the entire planet with its high-resolution camera and a powerful radar that can look for underground water. Scientists hope to gradually reduce the polar orbit and say that by Jan. 4, it should pass as low as 200-250 kilometers (125-155 miles) above the surface, enabling it to take close-up pictures and listen for Beagle. Britainâs powerful radio telescope at Jodrell Bank Observatory struck out again early Monday after sweeping the planetâs surface for the craftâs distinctive call sign, composed by the British band Blur.
"Gah! That noise! What can it be, Captain Skzgx?"
"I dunno. But it's kind of got a beat..."
"Stop waving your palps like that!" |
The 67-kilogram (143-pound) probe, which has a robotic arm to take soil and rock samples, was supposed to unfold its solar panels and transmit a signal confirming its arrival within hours of landing. An "analysis and recovery think tank" at Britainâs space center is working on possible scenarios to explain why it has failed to make contact. Even if Beagle fails to transmit its call sign, team member Alan Wells said in a statement that the sensitive radio telescope at Stanford University in California, which has joined the hunt, could scan the surface for low levels of radiation emitted by the probe.
"I found the low-level radiation, professor!"
"And...?"
"It blew all the readouts!"
"Send out for more gin!" |
Getting a working spacecraft to Mars has proven frustratingly difficult. Several vehicles, most recently NASAâs 1999 Mars Polar Lander, have been lost on landing. The Soviet Mars-3 lander touched down safely in 1971 but failed after sending data for only 20 seconds.
Various internet wags are having a lot of fun with this. Some(MG owners, no doubt) blame Lucas ("The Prince of Darkness") electronics:
"Why do the Brits drink warm beer? They have Lucas refrigerators."
"Lucas has 3 settings: Dim, Flicker, and Off"
One variation on the "crater theory": "Judge Crater found it on his lawn and called Martian Disposal Services to get rid of it."
My own theory: Martians spotted the Union Jack decal, assumed that Robert Fisk was inside, and beat it to a pulp.
Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy 2003-12-29 |
