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Bin Laden can't touch China: satire from Chinese people
Well I don't know about you, but I thought this was laugh-out-loud hilarious.
Bin Laden says: “China is the only country in the world where you absolutely cannot cause trouble! That’s because al-Qaeda once sent seven terrorists to launch a surprise attack on China, and the result was this:

When the first terrorist went to blow up a grade splitting bridge for road traffic [where one road goes on top and the other below], he got dizzy and fell over;

When the second terrorist went to blow up a bus, he couldn’t get on because it was too crowded;

When the third terrorist went to blow up a supermarket, he found that his remote detonation device had been pick-pocketed;

When the fourth terrorist went to blow a government building, he was beaten madly to pieces by security guards, who exclaimed: “We’ll teach you to demand wages and appeal to the authorities for help!”;

The fifth terrorist successfully blew up a mine and killed and injured several hundred people, yet after his clandestine return to al-Qaeda, not a single news report about the incident appeared in the media for six months, so al-Qaeda punished him for the “crime of spreading lies”;

The sixth terrorist attempted to blow up Guangzhou, yet when he exited the train station, his explosive material was forcibly stolen by the “Galloping Band” (feiche dang) of motorcycle thieves, which left him traumatized for quite some time;

The seventh terrorist went to blow up Tieling - the base of China’s steel industry - yet the sad appeals of Zhao Benshan [famous actor and comedian from northeast China] discouraged him.

Recently, a female terrorist was sent to blow up Henan, but she was hoodwinked and made a prostitute!

On May 1st, don’t go to Carrefour! Let the world know that China can’t be messed with! Happy Holidays!

It is hard to tell whether the author is truly proud of China and in support of the boycott, or is in fact ridiculing patriotic fervor because it obscures domestic issues, such as poor infrastructure, rampant crime, and strong-armed governance. The satire genre leaves plenty of room for interpretation.
Posted by: gromky 2008-05-02
http://www.rantburg.com/poparticle.php?ID=238085