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Two killed, as many injured as Taliban, locals trade fire
BARA Two persons were killed and two others sustained injuries on Thursday when Taliban and locals traded fire at Mulla Gori in tehsil Jamrod of Khyber Agency. Two brothers Abdul Qayyum and Sonny Sani, sons of Abdul Hameed, had a family dispute for a long time.
"Abdul, I want my lawn mower back!"
"I gave your lawn mower back!"
"That was not my lawn mower! My lawn mower was red!"
One of the brothers approached the local Taliban and requested them to solve the dispute through a jirga.
"Make him give my lawn mower back!"
"Okay. We'll have a jirga!"
"Good. I'll go get my gun!"
Sources said Abdul Qayyum did not attend the jirga held on Thursday on which the Taliban went to Qayyum’s house and asked him why he did not attend the jirga.
"Why didn't you go to the jirga, Abdul?"
"Cuz I didn't wanna go to the jirga!"
"Then go fer yer guns!"
Both sides exchanged fire which resulted in the killing of Qayyum
[BANG! BANG! BANGETY BANG!] "Aaaaaiiiieeee! Rosebud!"
and a chickpea seller Sufi, a resident of Shagai.
"Chickpeas! Getcher chickpeas! [KERPOW! BANG!]... Hey! My ciccerones!... Ow!... [BANG!] Hey! Stop it! That hurt!... [KERPOW!] Aaaaiiieee! Rosebud!"
Sufi succumbed to his injuries in a Peshawar hospital.
[Rattle!]
Rambail and Roohul Amin, a dispenser, were seriously injured.
"Ow! My elbow!"
"My spleen!"
However, they were said to be out of danger. Political administration officials said Sufi was seriously wounded and not dead.
"Really. I'm not dead."
"Shuddup and lay down!"

Posted by: Fred 2008-06-13
http://www.rantburg.com/poparticle.php?ID=241623