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Kerry familyâs deep pockets on display this election cycle
You want class warfare, I got your class warfare right here baby......How much would you pay for a bicycle? Is seven grand too much? Not as much as John Kerry, I daresay, now that we know, thanks to a front-page story about his butler in The New York Times, that he owns a Serotta bike. The Serotta, see, is custom-made, with the ``holistic approach to bicycle fitting.ââ translation: Our market will buy anything as long as its exclusive enough. Translation: Itâs very expensive. How expensive, you ask. Serottaâs ``price pointsââ are between $1,800 and $5,000 - just for the frame, mind you, if you want extras, like gears and titanium spokes, tack on another $2,000 - which raises the question: what do you suppose Kerryâs point is? Consider that Kerryâs second wife owns a Gulfstream V jet, the Flying Squirrel, my guess is they call it that because its full of nuts? or maybe because the owner is a bucktoothed rodent? it works on so many different levels. worth $35 million, and also bought him a personal powerboat, the Scaramouche, they did that with a with a straight face no less..... worth at least $800,000. So do you think Liveshotâs wifeâs first husbandâs trust fund bought a bike on the low end, or the high end? Iâll go out on a limb and say Liveshotâs bike is worth five large. And that it actually belongs, not to the solon himself, but to his ``family.ââ Repeated calls to Kerryâs campaign spokesman over the last two days were not returned. So I looked up Serotta bikes on the Web and came up with a list of local dealers, most of whom operate in such Beautiful People enclaves as Manchester-by-the-Sea and Amherst. Nearest to Kerryâs $12-million mansion were dealers in Belmont and a city the Web site described as ``Sommerville.ââ Naturally I first called the Serotta dealership in Belmont. I asked the guy the money question. Is Liveshot a customer? `Why yes he is,ââ said the gent, who did not wish to be identified. Let me guess - Teresa let him spend 5 grand on the type they use in the Tour de France, perhaps the Coeur dâAcier model, given its French name. I guess he wouldnât be caught dead on a bike someone would ride in the hell-of-the-west race. ``We wouldnât comment on customers,ââ he said, frostily.
Enough on the $5,000 bicycle. Now letâs move on his fleet of gas-guzzlers. Pardon me, his familyâs fleet of ozone-layer destroyers. not that there's anything wrong with that mind you, but hey - We didnt make it an issue. my thought is buy whatever the hell you want, its a free country. Apparently, Iâm in the minority. Before he tracked down his second heiress in 1995, Kerry had a â91 Jetta. Made in what part of America, thats right, good ole Stuttgart USA.....? In other words, 10 years ago his car was worth less than his bicycle is today. And some people say being a gigolo doesnât pay? David Lee Roth just popped into my head, I dont know why. QUICK - call the laura ingrham show, Iâve got a new Kerry campaign theme song. Kerry still owns his old â85 Dodge convertible. The excellent New York Times story on his butler Wednesday said that Kerryâs man Jeeves had ``inheritedââ the car, but guess what - Kerry just re-registered the Dodge. Its plate is Purple Heart 3, which means he didnât have to pay for the registration. holy lord, this has got to be a joke, will he please shut up about the purple hearts already! I watched Gettysburg and "Gods and Generals" back to back, I think I spent more time in combat after that than he did and Iâm sure I took more damage to my backside than Kerry did. Granted, he has every right to do that. But still, couldnât he have volunteered to pay the extra $75 . . . for the children? Then thereâs the 2002 Chrysler 300 sedan. Its current plate is USS 2. PT 109 was apparently taken by Ted somebody up in cape cod..... Of course, Liveshotâs not the only family member who likes special plates. Down on Nantucket, garaged at the $9 million mansion on Hulbert Avenue, his 65-year-old wife has a yellow â97 Land Rover Defender with the plate: MOZMBQ. As in Mozambique, donât you know, the widow Heinzâs country of origin. The â94 Jeep Grand Cherokee - its license plate is HZ 57. Her third vehicle, the 2001 Chrysler PT Cruiser, has a regular license plate. Known on the street as "barbies little coupe". Then thereâs the stepson, Christopher. Apparently he, too, didnât get the memo about only buying Made-in-the-USA vehicles. Heâs tooling around the island in a gray 2002 Porsche 911. again, not theres anything wrong with that.......
And this is from the Boston Herald...... Posted by: Frank Martin 2004-05-03 |
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