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Maybe Steyns' best yet? --- Whoa -- his site.... no editors....
Full article -- it's too good to click to read "the rest of the story"... enjoy...THE KERRYNESS OF KERRY If I've been following the campaign correctly, the typical John Kerry day involves an early-morning stop at Bud's Truck Stop on Rte 103 at which the Senator orders a hot dog. Asked what he wants on it, he says an aubergine and lemongrass coulis. Afterwards, he heads to Idaho for a windsurfing photo-op to communicate his virility, after first flying out his stylist from Cristophe's to mousse his hair into its windswept and tousled position. Following questions from the press on the cost of his hairdresser, he first denies that he has a hairdresser and then, when her curling tongs and rollers are pointed out in the back of his family's SUV, snaps, "She's not my hairdresser, she's the family's hairdresser." Later, after a two-man luge run with his Secret Service agent ends with him falling off after 50 yards, he snarls, "I don't fall off. That sonofabitch agent arched his back too high." Conceding that he was never in Cambodia on Christmas Eve 1968, the Senator says that those words were repeatedly placed in his mouth by over-zealous speechwriters. He wasn't in Cambodia, his wife's first husband's corporation's wholly owned subsidiary was in Cambodia. "But if George W Bush's Republican smear machine wants to make our service in Vietnam an issue, I say to them: BRING. IT. ON!"The day ends with the Senator throwing the first pitch at the Red Sox game. It lands on his red sock and breaks his toe, resulting in him taking two weeks off for surgery, in the course of which his numbers go up four points. Posted by: Sherry 2004-09-22 |
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