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Worst idea for a movie since umm... the last abomination...
Amish Tech Support points to this welcome news that "Hong Kong Phooey" is coming to the big screen, in the memorable tradition of Scooby Doo and Rocky and Bullwinkle. What I had to say about the idea caused his comments to go deader than Abu Nidal on the spot. At the risk of crashing my own server, I'll say it here: I will go to see no movie featuring a combination of live and animated characters until Clutch Cargo: The Motion Picture.If you're too young to have been exposed to Clutch Cargo, don't bother asking your parents about it â it was so awful as to be indescribable. I hadn't thought about ol' Clutch for years until I heard Chris Matthews, of all people, disparage some fellow with a wooden speaking style by comparing him. Then it all came back to me in a rush: the bad artwork, the yard-sale "animation" â actually still pictures, with only the lips moving, a total of two cells needed for each scene... Clutch's face was mostly manly jaw... cute sidekick kid with a pup, and he didn't have to go to school... and another sidekick with a sun helmet and a scruffy beard... and in one story they had an Eskimo... with a harpoon! By Gad, the Big Screen needs Clutch Cargo! Bill Quick knows how to write screenplays â somebody call him! We'll all be rich! Maybe we can get Whoopee Goldberg to make an appearance... Posted by: Fred Pruitt 2002-08-20 |
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