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Africa: East
Latest Somalia festivities threaten peace talks
2004-01-20
Tension between regional Somali leaders may scuttle the peace talks in Kenya, mediators have warned as fighting continues in central Somalia.
Is there anything that won't scuttle the Somali peace talks? Think hard, now...
Some 13 people were killed and several others injured after inter-clan fighting over land and water in Hiirran region at the weekend.
If they weren't fighting over land and water they'd be fighting over women and beer, or cheese and crackers, and whether today's Tuesday...
Kenya’s foreign affairs minister Kalonzo Musyoka has asked the leaders to exercise restraint to save the fragile negotiations.
"Yar! We be ferocious Islamic tough guys! We ain't got no restraint! Harrrr!"
The BBC’s Mohammed Olad Hassan in Mogadishu says the fighting in Hiirran is the worst since the faction leaders signed a ceasefire agreement last October.
"Yup. Yup. This is def'nitely worse'n last time..."
Efforts by local Somali elders to reconcile the warring militias are proving to be futile.
"Knock it off, youse guys!"
"Harrrr!"
"Never mind."
Meanwhile, the president of the breakaway region of Puntland in north-east Somalia, Abdulahi Yusuf Ahmed, has accused Djibouti of backing the self-declared republic of Somaliland. Troops from the two regions have recently been involved in border clashes. Mr Ahmed said that Djibouti was supplying arms, money and advice to authorities in Somaliland.
"Harrr! Yez can't trust them Djiboutis! Or Djiboutians. Or whatever the hell they call 'emselves!"
But Djibouti’s foreign affairs minister Ali Abdi Faraah dismissed the claims as "sheer propaganda".
"Those people are crazy!"
East Africa’s Inter Governmental Authority on Development (Igad) ministerial committee, which is trying to mediate in the Somali conflict, says the tension may plunge the region into conflict.
Where the hell's it been all this time?
Mr Musyoka called on the international community supporting the process to prevail upon the two parties to refrain from acts that would escalate into a fully fledged conflict.
"Yeah! Quit yellin' 'yarrr!' at each other! An' get them turbans off!"
Uganda’s President Yoweri Museveni and his Kenyan counterpart, Mwai Kibaki have warned the delegates that the process has been going on for far too long.
"C'mon! C'mon! Snap it up! There's others wants a turn in the peace procesor, y'know!"
The Somali peace process has so far cost over $7m with little results. Interim Somali President, Abdulkassim Salat Hassan, whose delegation walked out of talks in November, was persuaded to come thanks largely to a personal invitation from Mr Museveni. Correspondents say the deep divisions which exist between the different parties at the talks are plain for all to see.
"Harrrr!"
Posted by:Dan Darling

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