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Home Front: Politix
Kerry: I'll 'Pre-challenge' Florida Vote Count
2004-03-11
Sen. John Kerry says he doesn't believe in pre-emeptive action against terrorists, but apparently that principle applies only when America's national security is at stake. When it comes to his own political future, the Massachusetts Democrat is taking no such chances. He told a Florida audience this week that he's deploying a legal team to Florida before Nov. 2 in case Republicans try to "steal" the election, in a rerun of the contest Al Gore lost in 2000 by 537 votes. "We're going to pre-check it, we're going to have the legal team in place," Kerry told the Hollywood, Fla., crowd. "We're going to take injunctions where necessary ahead of time. We'll pre-challenge if necessary." Just to be on the safe side, Sen. Kerry might want to get his "pre-concession" speech ready as well.
Mwaaaahhaaahhhhaaaa! The Secret Plan™ is working to perfection! Little do they know that when they get their legions of lawyers in their serried ranks all moved to Florida at $450 an hour (cheap!), the Publicans are going to win Wisconsin by just 537 votes!
Posted by:Old Patriot

#14  Wonderful, and be sure the military votes are all counted this time, Skeery. (Don't hold your breath.)
Posted by: GK   2004-3-11 11:21:01 PM  

#13  This is real?
Well this doesn't make The Tin Man sound all that confident does it? The Dems better get one of their SWAT teams down there to pass out the free smokes and Mad Dog to the bums to be on the safe side. That ketchup money will buy a lot of nicotine and cheap hootch.
Posted by: tu3031   2004-3-11 11:09:23 PM  

#12  Didn't scrappleface have an article with this exact same plot several days ago?
Posted by: Charles   2004-3-11 10:50:45 PM  

#11  Rex - According to the Firesign Boyz, those are called hot buttered grub clusters. There appears to be confusion with Kerry regards whence they come and whence they go. And, BTW, no - it's not you! You're on-target! ;->
Posted by: .com   2004-3-11 10:01:07 PM  

#10  Rex Mundi asks:
I dunno...is it me?
No. Why do you ask?
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2004-3-11 9:47:15 PM  

#9  FloriDUH.
Posted by: B   2004-3-11 9:44:59 PM  

#8  I thought this was from Scrappleface, until I clicked on the link :>(
Posted by: ed   2004-3-11 9:33:29 PM  

#7  And so the Democrats announce their belief that elections aren't as important as lawyers. If they have success with this...
Posted by: Robert Crawford   2004-3-11 9:25:26 PM  

#6  What a tool. It's getting increasingly difficult to deal with the big, steaming, peanut filled, chunks of sphincter fudge that extrudes from his pie hole everytime he speaks. I dunno...is it me?
Posted by: Rex Mundi   2004-3-11 7:54:16 PM  

#5  I wonder how Kerry's "Band of Brothers" is going to feel about him when he sends out his mob of lawyers to disqualify every possible absentee military ballot come election time?
Posted by: Dave D.   2004-3-11 7:45:34 PM  

#4  I suspect it won't be that close this time.
I can see Al-Katie Couric and Tom Broken now: "This just in our computer projection shows Florida going to Bush. At this time President Bush has a lead of 200,000 votes. Tom this is hard to beleive". Tom: "What that we've got the news wrong all year?"
Posted by: Bill Nelson   2004-3-11 7:42:09 PM  

#3  Well said Barbara!
Posted by: Cyber Sarge (VRWC CA Chapter)   2004-3-11 7:35:10 PM  

#2  
Just to be on the safe side, Sen. Kerry might want to get his "pre-concession" speech ready as well.
Heh.
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2004-3-11 7:32:39 PM  

#1  Rule number one for all Forida elections. Don't let a Democrat design the goddamn ballot in the first place. For all the screwed up things that happened in Florida in 2000 what about all of the votes in Illinois, California and other states that never got counted.
Posted by: Cheddarhead   2004-3-11 7:19:20 PM  

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