From Arab News...
Why do Muslim nations do so badly in international sports?
The real answer lies in the marginal place that Muslim nations play in a world system in the creation of which they did not play a part and in which they do not quite feel at home. Within the Muslim group of nations those that are least "Islamic" did the best. The secular republics of Turkey, Azerbaijan, Kazakhstan and Uzbekistan bagged 24 of the 42 medals won by the Muslim nations, including six of the 13 gold medals.
| Obviously they need more shariah. Can't be a loser without shariah... |
Six nations have labeled themselves "Islamic republic" in recent years. They are Mauritania, Sudan, Iran, Pakistan and Afghanistan. Only one, Iran, captured any medals two gold, one silver and one bronze.
| Iran and Pakland are also the only ones where the press carries much of anything about sports that I've seen... |
In many Muslim countries the more traditional elements regard sports as an indulgence that could divert human attention from religious duties. In the 1970s when Iran hosted the Asian Olympics, several mullas, including the late Ayatollah Khomeini, denounced the exercise as "a Jewish-Crusader conspiracy" to take Muslims out of mosques and into sports stadiums. One of Khomeini's first acts, after he seized power in 1979, was to disband all the 600 or so sports clubs and associations that operated throughout Iran. Even football, the nation's favorite sport, was banned for three years.
| It's hard to be devout when you're having fun, isn't it? |
Some theologians are opposed to sports because it requires physical contact. And that, in a culture, which is uncomfortable with the human body as such, is always a source of alarm.
| I'm still trying to figure where little Moose limbs come from... |
Iranian mullas, for example, have tried for decades to ban free-style wrestling, a sports that has a history of 3000 years in the country, because of fears that it might encourage homosexual tendencies between adversaries whose almost naked bodies are bound to touch in the course of a match. The sport has managed to survive the advent of Khomeinism by forcing wrestlers to compete fully clothed.
"Don't worry, Aredeshir! We can get nekkid after the match!"
"I'll bring the melons!" |
Some Muslim despots fear sports as an activity that could open spaces beyond the control of the regime. They are also uncomfortable with sports stars whose popularity could nibble at the prestige of the "supreme leader".
| They could do what Kimmie does, and simply excel at everything... |
With a good portion of their resources allocated to the military, most Muslim nations have little money left to spend on such "luxuries" as sport. Iran, for example, boasts only one Olympics size swimming pool, built in the 1970s by the Shah for the nation's once famous water-polo team. In Indonesia fewer than five percent of school-age children receive regular physical education. In most cases Muslim athletes must hold one or more jobs to pay for their own training. Eight of the 13 athletes who won gold medals either trained outside the Muslim world or benefited from private donations, rather than government support, at home. Turkey, the leader of the Muslim world in sports, devotes less than one percent of its national budget to sports, compared to 18 percent for defense.
| On the other hand, the national basketball team has never fended off an invasion, has it? On the third hand, having borders with Muslim countries is probably where the fear of invasion comes from... |
There is one other reason why the Muslim world does so badly in international sports: The virtually total absence of women. In Athens women athletes represented 39 percent of the total. In the case of the Muslim countries, however, women athletes accounted for no more than nine percent. Some Muslim countries brought no women athletes at all while others, including Iran, came with a single one, fully hijabed from head to toe.
| Wouldn't want one of her titties to pop out, or the world to catch a fleeting glimpse of a buttock... |
Most estimates show that women account for more than half of he population of all Muslim nations. And yet they are almost completely shut out of the world of sports.
| ... along with everything else. |
In some countries physical education is forbidden for girls. In others, like Iran, fear that men might steal illicit glances of the female body prevents the building of sports facilities for women. By denying more than half of their population the opportunity to compete in any sport, Muslim nations reduce their overall chances of winning medals at events such as the Athens Games.
| Not to mention reducing their wimminfolk to breeding stock... |
In many Muslim countries women are shut out of numerous sporting fields, notably swimming,
| Hard to swim in a gunny sack... |
cycling,
| One too many incidents of illicit seat-sniffing... |
riding,
wrestling,
| Not even jello, mud, or Jolly Green Giant creamed corn... |
football
| "No, no! They jiggle too much!" |
and, of course, gymnastics.
| "Oh, by Allan! She's 12 years old, and she's limber and lithe! Oh, get me my gun! I must... I must... I must shoot off!" |
Having done steadily worse in the past four Olympics, there is little hope that the Muslim nations would do any better in Beijing in four years time. |
