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Iraq-Jordan
The Insanity Defense
2005-01-10
Forcing naked Iraqi prisoners to pile themselves in human pyramids was not torture, because American cheerleaders do it every year, a court was told today.
Gawd, I love nekkid cheerleaders, all in a pile, with their... ummm... I mean, good point!
A lawyer defending Specialist Charles Graner, who is accused of being a ringleader in the Abu Ghraib prisoner abuse scandal, argued that piling naked prisoners in pyramids was a valid form of prisoner control.
I guess you could say that. It wouldn't make any sense, but you could say it. I'd hate to see his weekly staff meetings...
"Don't cheerleaders all over America form pyramids six to eight times a year. Is that torture?" said Guy Womack, Sergeant Graner's lawyer, in opening arguments to the ten-member military jury at the reservist's court martial...
Doubtful this will be made into a JAG episode any time soon.
Are they nekkid when they do it? Can I watch?
Posted by:Anonymoose

#9  "The Iraqi POW prefers kickin' up into a pyramid formation. Beau'iful plumage, eh?"
Posted by: BH   2005-01-10 9:24:21 PM  

#8  Ima surprised PD doesn't have a nekkid cheerleader pyramid pic linked....guess I'll have to search my HD
Posted by: Frank G   2005-01-10 9:13:05 PM  

#7  ima thinkerin more long the chewbaca defense lines
Posted by: muck4doo   2005-01-10 9:12:25 PM  

#6  You mean, "If the panties don't fit, you MUST acquit", mucky?
Posted by: Dave D.   2005-01-10 8:16:50 PM  

#5  im gues cochrane werent avaylable
Posted by: muck4doo   2005-01-10 8:14:02 PM  

#4  CF - I know, heh. ;-)
Posted by: .com   2005-01-10 7:47:03 PM  

#3  Last I heard, cheerleaders tend to be clothed, more or less. Oh, and volunteers.

But I have to say that, while this was definitely abuse, certainly torment, I wouldn't call it torture. Which wouldn't stop me from voting for a minimum of stripping the man of all rank, condemning him to maximum allowable imprisonment at hard labour, to be followed by a dishonourable discharge, were I on the jury. As I recall, Graner had been dumped from the Armed Forces once, went on to become a prison guard -- where he had a habit of similarly abusing civilian prisoners -- and rejoined as a Reservist. Someone screwed up: with that record he should never have been allowed near Abu Ghraib.

Anyway, it seems to me that keeping each prisoner in a separate cell (and I understand that Abu G. had plenty of those) would function as an adequate method of prisoner control. Admittedly, I've only visited a prison once in my entire life, and never been responsible for controlling large numbers of putatively bad people, but still.
Posted by: trailing wife   2005-01-10 7:44:49 PM  

#2  So perhaps he can tell us where we can watch naked cheerleaders piling themselves in a pyramid....
Posted by: CrazyFool   2005-01-10 7:44:09 PM  

#1  Jeez, I thought this was Scrappleface until I followed the link.
Posted by: Dave D.   2005-01-10 7:28:27 PM  

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