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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Men helpless against new perfume
2005-01-29
A SCENT exuded by young women as a subconscious sex attractant has been synthesised for post-menopausal women, who are finding it is luring men in droves, the British weekly New Scientist says. Forty-four women took part in an experiment to see whether the pheromone - an odour received by heterosexual men as a sign of mating availability - worked for females beyond child-bearing age. Half the group added a chemical copy of the pheromone to their perfume, while the other added a lookalike dummy compound. None of the participants knew whether they were getting the real ingredient or the fake. For the next six weeks, the women kept diaries.
Dear Diary,
Tonite Henry jumped me without warning as I was serving the creamed spinach. Phil and Harriet were scandalized and the party was ruined.
Among the pheromone users, 41 per cent reported they experienced more petting, kissing and affection with partners, compared with 14 per cent among the placebo group. Overall, 68 per cent of the pheromone groups reported increases in at least four "intimate socio-sexual behaviours," such as sex and formal dates. In the placebo group, only 41 per cent reported increases. The report, carried in next Saturday's New Scientist, is based on a study in a specialist publication, The Journal of Sex Research.
I used to read that. But only for the articles.
The research was carried out by Harvard University's Joan Friebely and Massachusetts doctor Susan Rako. What exactly is in the chemical is secret for the time being.
Eye of newt, hair of bat, and a few other ingredients...
The pheromone's discoverer, biologist Winnifred Cutler, is keeping its identity confidential until patents have been granted for her organisation, the Athena Institute for Women's Wellness Research in Chester Springs, Pennsylvania.
Don't believe her! She's keeping it for herself!
If the synthetic pheromone ever goes to market, joining other duplicates of human body odours - advertising specialists have a challenge on their hands. The secret odour does not come from the essence of alpine flowers or exotic spices so beloved of perfume ads to create a romantic image: it was isolated from a young woman's armpit sweat.
"Maudette! You smell so... so... sweaty! Let's have sex!"
Posted by:tipper

#16  The male analog will hit the market shortly after. The tentative shelf name is "Bucket o' Cash".
Posted by: BH   2005-01-29 9:43:00 PM  

#15  jeez Wiley, it's almost dinner time! stop the visuals!
Posted by: Frank G   2005-01-29 7:57:01 PM  

#14  The acid test:

Being sexually attracted to Janet Reno or Mad Halfbright. Now those two are armpit sweat personified.
Posted by: Duke Nukem   2005-01-29 7:54:51 PM  

#13  So is this a for-external-use-only Love Potion #9?

Just don't kiss that copy down on 43rd & Vine, BaR.
Posted by: Elmoluling Snesing5118   2005-01-29 6:43:00 PM  

#12  good thing I have three ....that I know of
Posted by: Frank G   2005-01-29 6:30:12 PM  

#11  Bill Clinton: in a society with a declining population, it is important that they develop policies that encourage reproduction. Some of these may seem "immoral" or "irresponsible", such as favoring the fertile over the infertile, and promulgating social acceptance of "reckless" reproduction. While it is generally agreed that it is preferable for a child is raised in economic abundance, it is *not* essential. It is an opinion. Children do not *need* $500 tennis shoes, video games, and to eat dinner at restaurants every night. If parents could raise two children modestly, or one child with "high havingness", it is better for society if they raise two. And ways must be found to encourage parents to have three or four or more children as the norm. Unfortunately, most of the people who use birth control the most, shouldn't, and this is a problem.
Posted by: Anonymoose   2005-01-29 6:25:30 PM  

#10  So is this a for-external-use-only Love Potion #9?
Posted by: Bomb-a-rama   2005-01-29 6:15:27 PM  

#9  Well I don't need them using that. I am attracted to ALL women. Gets me in to trouble too. This will just make it worse.
Posted by: SPOD   2005-01-29 3:40:09 PM  

#8  Um Gott es will, Barbara :-)

Should this become popular -- and I can't imagine otherwise, given how many are having voluntary plastic surgery nowadays -- I would expect two things:

1) Those older women in committed relationships to have much improved sex lives, and

2) Natural selection weeding out those men overly susceptible to this particular pheromone within two generations (as they go after the infertile/less fertile females).

Long term, this will just result in a slight alteration in the species. No biggie.
Posted by: trailing wife   2005-01-29 3:12:19 PM  

#7  " Society should discourage the infertile from having sex with the fertile "

Its nice to read comments like yours above moose.
What about " volunterily sterile " ( vasectomy )
people having sex with the fertile ?
Posted by: Bill Clinton   2005-01-29 2:05:38 PM  

#6  It's not nice to fool with mother nature. I would not find it amiss for societies with falling populations to issue such a substance to young, fertile women; if an equivalent existed for males, likewise it should be given to young, virile men.
Because reproduction is essential to any society.
However, post-middle-aged people having sex with younger people should be limited to only those young people who *can't* reproduce for some reason or another. This could include those who are abhorred by the opposite sex, are sterile, suffer from genetic diseases or other disability making them incapable of having children. This is not as oppressive as it sounds: no one is denied anything except the use of special attractants to lure sex partners. Society should discourage the infertile from having sex with the fertile. Biologically, this also raises the point that women would prefer to have children from the "optimal" sperm donor. But only a few males have that special something, those traits, that the majority of women want in a sperm donor. So a substance of this kind helps women to have a larger pool of males from which to choose; and yet, it limits diversity in the long run, as most women will make similar choices. So one man will make 20 children, and a dozen other men will make none.
Posted by: Anonymoose   2005-01-29 1:54:16 PM  

#5  " for post-menopausal women "

K Y and a new synthetic pheromone
Hillary will be happy !!
Posted by: Bill Clinton   2005-01-29 1:50:37 PM  

#4  ...and men have something that lures women. It's called money.
Posted by: Raj   2005-01-29 1:43:32 PM  

#3  Emperor Wang? ROFL!

Obviously my education is very deficient in some areas (Gott sei dank!).
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2005-01-29 1:17:54 PM  

#2  Mike, you're thinking of "Flesh Gordon" - you know, the one where Emperor Wang from the Planet Porno attacks Earth with the Sex Ray. :)

Whadda film!!
Posted by: Doc8404   2005-01-29 11:52:44 AM  

#1  ...I think I saw this flick on MST3K once...


Mike
Posted by: Mike Kozlowski   2005-01-29 11:36:04 AM  

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