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China-Japan-Koreas |
Efficacious Mud Goods Made in DPRK |
2005-07-07 |
Progress contiues it's inexorable march in the DPRK! Pyongyang, July 6 (KCNA) -- Various kinds of mud goods made in the Democratic People's Republic of Korea are popular in local and foreign markets for their medicinal and nutritive properties. A place on the west coast of the DPRK abounds in uncontaminated mud. It contains S, mineral matters, various vitamins, essential amino acid, organic acid, hormone, antibiotic medicine, enzyme, anti-oxidants and other useful substances. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...mud! "Ryuhwanggamthang" (Sulfur Mud) is efficacious for treating and preventing various skin diseases including eczema, and chilblain, burn, neuralgia, arthritis, arteriosclerosis, chronic hepatitis, ulcer diseases, etc. And it's soooooo much cheaper then actual medicine! "Hanjungyokje" (Sauna Mud) is rubbed all over the body before and after sauna. It helps sweat well and makes the skin soft and fair and removes scurf. Especially it is potent for pruritus, nutrition impediment, aging, neuralgia, arthritis and arteriosclerosis. ...and not only that. It's one of the few things we've got plenty of! The cosmetics made with the mud improve the skin nutrition. They help people have dark spots, wrinkles and others removed from their faces. It also helps to camoflage the face when sneaking over the Chinese border! Meanwhile, the seed-covering material and feed additive made with by-products of above-said mud goods make it possible to increase grain output and the production of domestic animals, spawns and meat, and to prevent diseases. Mud steak, mud burgers, mud salad dressing... even on a bad day, there's always KCNA to take the edge off. |
Posted by:Pinchy |
#5 This land is made of mountains This land is made of mud This land is made of everything for me and Elmer Fudd This land is full of trousers This land is full of mausers and pussycats to hunt them all when the sun goes down. --Firesign Theater |
Posted by: Alaska Paul 2005-07-07 23:10 |
#4 One kilogram of mud personally "blessed" by Dear Leader Kim Jong-Il? |
Posted by: BigEd 2005-07-07 16:38 |
#3 Scurf? Izzat like scurvy? Out, damned spot! |
Posted by: .com 2005-07-07 14:46 |
#2 removes scurf? Geeebus! If I had scurf, whatever that it, I'd want it gone! Where do i buy some of the miracle mud? |
Posted by: Frank G 2005-07-07 14:18 |
#1 North Korea = Elbonia? |
Posted by: Jackal 2005-07-07 13:37 |