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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Fatwa: No nudity during sex
2006-01-12
Cairo - An Egyptian cleric's controversial fatwa claiming that nudity during sexual intercourse invalidates a marriage has uncovered a rift among Islamic scholars. According to the religious edict issued by Rashad Hassan Khalil, a former dean of Al-Azhar University's faculty of Sharia (or Islamic law), "being completely naked during the act of coitus annuls the marriage"...

For his part, Al-Azhar's fatwa committee chairman Abdullah Megawar argued that married couples could see each other naked but should not look at each other's genitalia and suggested they cover up with a blanket during sex.
Since any idiot can issue a fatwah, and two have done so on this subject, I think I'll issue one, too:
Married couples validate their marriages by looking at each other naked, particularly in the area of the pee-pee. Not only are they required to look, but they're also required to fondle That Which is Not Available to the General Public and to exchange mutual compliments on size, texture, flavor, hair styling, and desirability, as appropriate.

This was revealed to me in a dream, where I was visited by the Angel Trixie, so there's no arguing with it. It comes directly from Upstairs.
Posted by:Hupoluse Shairong5035

#16  a2u - LOL that's brutal!
Posted by: Frank G   2006-01-12 21:50  

#15  A Kiwi walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."

His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies: "I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot."

The man says: " I think YOU'LL find that I wasn't talking to you..."

Posted by: anonymous2u   2006-01-12 20:24  

#14  Isn't this just dry humping?
Posted by: DragonFly   2006-01-12 17:35  

#13  Now if we could convince them that Allah only allows booty sex, our problems would vanish in a single generation.
Posted by: BH   2006-01-12 14:51  

#12  Good news all around!

Idiots who are moronic enough to comply with this latest fatwa will encounter more situations where their aardvarking* is less than successful due to intervening clothing layers.

Less than successful Islamic aardvarking = A safer world.

What's not to like?

*Thank you, Joe Bob.
Posted by: Zenster   2006-01-12 14:26  

#11  Pasties anyone?

Al
Posted by: Frozen Al   2006-01-12 13:15  

#10  Um, that's a little more info than we need, A5089, lol.
Posted by: .com   2006-01-12 12:23  

#9  Shaved goat... now I'm aroused!
Posted by: anonymous5089   2006-01-12 12:20  

#8  Is it still okay to shave the goat? Or would that be...wrong?
Posted by: tu3031   2006-01-12 10:35  

#7  And try not to enjoy it too much! Think of baseball! Think of baseball! Think-- oops.
Posted by: BH   2006-01-12 10:27  

#6  Do not look! My wedding tackle is enormous! Really! Don't look! Fatwa! Fatwa!
Posted by: rjschwarz   2006-01-12 10:00  

#5  Three kids!

ROTFLOL
Posted by: lotp   2006-01-12 09:55  

#4  "We wuz married for four years before I found out she wuz a guy! Four years! Three kids!"
Posted by: Fred   2006-01-12 09:53  

#3  When they say "in between the sheets" they are not kidding.

Of course this business of sex with clothes on should set off all kinds of red flags, not the least of which includes TRANNY ALERT!
Posted by: The Angry Fliegerabwehrkanonen   2006-01-12 08:52  

#2  Trixie - ROFL!
Posted by: .com   2006-01-12 02:39  

#1  Communism in practice killed off whatever various international wars for the Proletariat didn't - sound like the Raddies and God-based Socialists are trying to go one further and make sex akin to biological poison, or at least have as many horny hungry thirsty poor desperate males - read, future People's Army soldiers - as China and India.
Posted by: JosephMendiola   2006-01-12 00:31  

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