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Bangladesh
Tales from the Crossfire Gazette©
2006-10-19
An outlaw and an alleged robber were killed in "crossfire" during shootouts between their accomplices and the law enforcers in Kushtia and Chittagong early yesterday. The dead are identified as Milon Hossain, 35, a member of the outlawed Biplobi Communist Party (BCP) and Abdus Salek, 42, leader of an organised gang of robbers.
Which, mind you, is not the same thing as being the leader of an organized gang of Biplobi Communist robbers...
It's considered a much higher calling
Our correspondent from Kushtia said that the police arrested Milon at his house in Dhalnagar village under Kumarkhali upazila on Tuesday morning.
[Knock knock!]
"Who's there?"
"It's the RAB! We here for Milo!"
"I ain't here!"
During interrogation at Kumarkhali Police Station, he confessed to having firearms hidden in different areas.
"Owwww! Aaaaiiieeee! Yes! It's true! I have firearms hidden in different areas!"
"What areas?"
"Diff'rent areas!"
Later, police took him to Dhalnagar village to retrieve the firearms.
"Please don't kill me!"
"Too late for that Milon, we've already signed out the shutter gun."
As they reached at Badh Bazar area, 5 kilometres off the Dhalnagar at around 4:30am, the BCP cadres opened fire on them. The law enforcers retaliated resulting in a half an hour-long gunfight.
[BANG! BANG! BANGETY BANG!] "Die, RAB running dog lackies!"
[BANG! BANG! KERPOW!] "Take that, Biplobi commies!"
Milon fell in the line of fire when he tried to escape, police said.
"Don't shoot Biplobi comrades! It is I!... I... I... Aaaaaiiiieee!"
He died on the spot.
"Rosebud!" [rattle!]
Police seized three bullets from the scene.
Must have left the shutter gun back at the cop shoppe ...
Milon was accused in 12 cases, including three for murder.
Wanted on twelve systems, he was...
A total 116 alleged criminals, the highest across the country, have been killed so far in Kushtia since June 2004.
"We're number one, we're number one!"

Meanwhile, UNB from Chittagong reports that Abdus Salek and five others were arrested by the Rapid Action Battalion (Rab) during an operation at Sarol union in Banshkhali upazila Tuesday morning.
"Stick 'em up, Abdus! You, too, you five!"
Following his confessional statement,
"Aaaaiiieee! I confess!"
Rab took him to Kataria village of the same upazila at about 4:30am to recover hidden arms and arrest his cohorts.
"It's 4.30 am! Time to recover the hidden arms! Into the paddy wagon wit' yez, Abdus!"
"Don't kill me!"
"Shuddup."
"Please don't kill me!"
"Mahmoud, hit him!"
"Owwww!"
"As soon as they came near the den of Salek, his cohorts opened fire on the law enforcers in a bid to snatch Salek, forcing the Rab men to retaliate," said a police official.
"You may fire when ready, Gridley!"
Salek got caught in the 'crossfire' while trying to escape and died on the spot.
"Feet, don't fail me.....KAPOW!"
"Aaaaaiiiieee! [Thud!] Rosebud! [rattle!]"
The body was sent to morgue for autopsy.
"Dr. Quincy! Pick up the white courtesy phone!"
A member of the notorious Amin Bahini, Salek was also a leader of an organised gang of robbers, police said.
But not an organized gang of Biplobi Communist robbers; he had his standards, he did ...
Posted by:Fred

#3  Ya gotta admit it saves all that paperwork of trial, evidence, verdict, appeals ad nauseum.
Posted by: Rich W   2006-10-19 19:14  

#2  More fun than ol' Milo and Abdus, at any rate...
Posted by: Seafarious   2006-10-19 00:54  

#1  Lol. You guys are having waaay too much fun!
Posted by: .com   2006-10-19 00:48  

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