| Submit your comments on this article |
| Fifth Column |
| What I Learned from 9-11 Conspiracy Theories |
| 2007-01-30 |
| # The U.S. is actually quite popular worldwide; so much so, in fact, that its government must create artificial terrorist organizations to attack it. Left to their own devices, everybody else pretty much respects Americans and leaves them alone. # It takes the complacency or cooperation of the world's largest superpower to hijack a defenseless civilian aircraft. # If you believe what your government tells you about 9-11, you are part of the conspiracy or, at least, part of "the problem." But if you accuse people at all levels of the government, including the U.S. military, of planning and carrying out the largest terrorist attack on U.S. soil, killing thousands of civilians, then you are a patriot. # The large fireballs seen at the WTC impacts look like napalm explosions, so it was probably a napalm bomb that actually caused the damage. Of course, napalm being jellied fuel, and jet aircraft being full of fuel, you can see the vast difference there. # The WTC towers fell in what was obviously a controlled demolition. The largest, messiest, deadliest, most witnessed, most mismanaged, most ill-timed, most poorly executed, and most uncontrolled controlled demolition in history. # The government planted explosives at the exact aircraft impact sites of the Pentagon and both WTC towers, the explosives and activity surrounding their placement went completely unnoticed, the rigging of the explosives was unharmed by the aircraft impacts, and they went off exactly when planned. # Somehow orchestrating the hijacking of multiple airliners to have them crash at explosive-rigged sites was more effective than just setting off the explosives by themselves in the first place. # Those plane crashes were like so totally fake cuz they were so totally unlike all the real fiery passenger jet crashes into buildings I've seen in real life. # When you refer to the planes, say "alleged aircraft." When referring to the terrorists, say "alleged terrorists." Because not only can we not be sure they even existed, but also, "alleged" has such a nice, objective ring to it. |
| Posted by:Mike |
| #9 whoops, meant "747 that entered said hole..." |
| Posted by: BA 2007-01-30 19:56 |
| #8 I think the most ridiculous one I saw was the one by a *supposed* scientist who said the crash at the Pentagon couldn't have happened because the hole in the side of the building wasn't EXACTLY the same width as the wingspan of the *supposed* 747 the entered said hole. Not even discussing all the eyewitnesses there, or the video from that pay to park camera in the lot nextdoor, or the fact that wings can sheer off when hitting ground (or solid limestone buildings) at 400 or so MPH. Nah, that's too logical dooods, and I'm an expert! I SAY that it's a gov't conspiracy 'cause the hole in the Pentagon's not large ENOUGH! Mind boggles how any of these *scientists/engineers* made it thru Sally Struthers' Tech College online. |
| Posted by: BA 2007-01-30 19:55 |
| #7 C'mon. Who could doubt an expert like Charlie Sheen on such matters? I'm sure the inside info he gets from his coke dealers and porn star girlfriends is pure gold. That'd almost be like saying Barbara Steisand doesn't know anything about Global Climate Change Warming. |
| Posted by: tu3031 2007-01-30 15:29 |
| #6 LOL Grunter! |
| Posted by: Shipman 2007-01-30 15:25 |
| #5 Scene in an office, WTC. "Hey buddy, can we move your desk? I gotta drill this hole in the wall?" "Uh OK" Later... "OK I'm done now. Don't touch the red stuff, that's Dynamite." "What! What's going on?" "Can't tell you, sorry. Big secret. Gotta run, we got 400,000 of these to do..." |
| Posted by: Grunter 2007-01-30 13:17 |
| #4 More proof that the human race, as far as Darwin is concerned, is no longer weeding out the weak, sick and stupid. |
| Posted by: DarthVader 2007-01-30 09:44 |
| #3 "...Anyone who believes that should not be allowed to walk around without a keeper -" - Edmund Burke Mike |
| Posted by: Mike Kozlowski 2007-01-30 08:20 |
| #2 Penn and Teller summed the whole thing up in one word. |
| Posted by: doc 2007-01-30 08:10 |
| #1 The WTC towers fell in what was obviously a controlled demolition it was a controlled demolition because an uncontrolled one, one that would have the buildings fall to the side and would look unplanned, would kill innocent passers by. how utterly inane is that? |
| Posted by: PlanetDan 2007-01-30 07:37 |