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| Science & Technology |
| Super toilet made for modern kings and queens |
| 2007-02-07 |
| Now that's a shitter... Think you deserve a throne? A U.S. plumbing firm has created a luxury toilet equipped with laptop computer and flat-screen TV which it plans to give away in an online sweepstake. Ohio-based Roto-Rooter says its "Pimped Out John" is designed to "fulfill all your wildest bathroom dreams." Well...almost. Special features include an iPod music player and speakers, an Xbox video game console, a refrigerator filled with drinks and snacks and a cycling exercise machine. You can keep the snacks, thanks... "The bathroom is the perfect place for your very own throne. It shouldn't always be regarded as the room of last resort," said Steven Pollyea, Roto-Rooter vice president of marketing, in a press release emailed to Reuters. "The average person spends 11,862 hours in the bathroom, which equals one year, four months and five days in a lifetime... a toilet should be the most wonderful location in your home." Damn right! Roto-Rooter spokesman Paul Abrams said the firm spent about $5,000 on parts and components to customize the toilet. Any resident of the United States could win this "gleaming monument to personal convenience" by entering the sweepstake at www.rotorooter.com before April 2. I wonder if their server will crash? You might never want to leave your bathroom again. My wife thinks I spend enough time in there now... |
| Posted by:tu3031 |
| #9 man, talkin about some shit on rantburg tonight |
| Posted by: sinse 2007-02-07 21:12 |
| #8 Fiber, Anonymous, more fiber. Try a little bran. I'll take the padded seat though. |
| Posted by: Thinemp Whimble2412 2007-02-07 20:45 |
| #7 All one needs is a good book and a padded seat. All the rest is for people with no imagination. |
| Posted by: Old Patriot 2007-02-07 19:25 |
| #6 The Japanese have had it for some time. And it doesn't cost $5,000. |
| Posted by: Nimble Spemble 2007-02-07 18:42 |
| #5 Nothing! I say nothing! I bow to superior weirdness. |
| Posted by: Shipman 2007-02-07 18:35 |
| #4 The average person spends 11,862 hours in the bathroom, which equals one year, four months and five days in a lifetime... What's that work out to on a per-day basis? Worth the investment? |
| Posted by: Earl 2007-02-07 17:35 |
| #3 Form should follow function. For example, the toilet is also the place where many people die in the process of the strain and discomfort of an uncooperative bowel movement. So the toilet should not just be an efficient drain. Even the incorporation of a warm bidet with a toilet, while desirable, is not the ultimate in excremeditatorial comfort. It should also have a gentle, distilled water enema feature integrated into the system. A shallow enema, just gently flooding the rectum, instead of like a full enema, that floods into the lower intestine. Warm distilled water, as heavily chlorinated tap water is not good for your intestinal flora, a healthy balance of which is essential for good health, but also, because due to an eccentricity of human plumbing, there are some large blood vessels in the rectum that have an almost direct connection to the liver. No reason to chlorinate the liver. The ideal toilet should also be considerably higher, based on the knee height of the user, and conforming with his posterior for maximum comfort. And yes, a padded seat is a must, but it must also be contoured so that it puts less pressure on the sciatic nerves of either leg. This often causes the legs to go to sleep after an extended sojourn, and is most unpleasant if the sciatic nerves are otherwise irritated. Finally, though sitting rigidly upright might seem to be the best position for defecation, study should be made to determine the best posture for both it and respite in between efforts. In the final analysis, we are still confronted with just a basic technology for this important part of our lives. |
| Posted by: Anonymoose 2007-02-07 17:32 |
| #2 Sounds like an updated version of the "Man's Bathroom" from "Home Improvement" |
| Posted by: Rambler 2007-02-07 17:00 |
| #1 Does it have a padded seat? |
| Posted by: gorb 2007-02-07 16:55 |