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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Islamic Ideology, Jihadist Doctrine or Spiritual Quest? - You Decide! |
| 2007-05-04 |
| [ open on Wahabbist mosque, Imam and terrorist arguing ] Terrorist: It's a war for Islamic domination! Iman: It's a spiritual quest! Terrorist: It's a war for Islamic domination! Iman: It's a spiritual quest, you donkey! CAIR Spokesman: [ enters quickly ] Hey, hey, hey, calm down, you two Islamists. Global jihad is both a spiritual quest and a war for Islamic domination! Here, I'll load up your bomb vest.. [ stuffs C-4 into pouches ] ..and issue a fatwah condoning it. [ hands imam a scroll ] [ Imam reads scroll while terrorist straps on vest ] Iman: Wow, this sanctifies everything! Terrorist: And just look at my new vest! But will it detonate? CAIR Spokesman: Hey, global jihad threatens every other leading political ideology, 2 to 1. It's intolerant, and easy to trigger. Iman: And it's holy! CAIR Spokesman: Sure is! Perks up anything from a Friday prayer session to a huge terrorist rally! Terrorist: Made from an exclusive non-percussive formula. Iman: I haven't even finished reading this fatwa and I'm ready for another! Terrorist: But what about the Jews? CAIR Spokesman: Jews, shiites, even moderate Muslims, are wiped off of the map. [ Imam briefly shows fatwa to terrorist ] Iman: So, shaheed, what do you think? Terrorist: Oh, no problem, not with global jihad! [ CAIR Spokesman laughs continuously as he approaches the camera ] CAIR Spokesman: Global jihad, for the greatest ideology you ever exploded! |
| Posted by:Zenster |
#4 Oh, all right, wxjames:Not available in stores, see your local mosque for details. Turbans and detonators sold separately. Stated threat levels are for comparison purposes only. Your death toll may vary depending upon location and blast conditions. See your imam for more indoctrination. Extended warranty not available for explosives. Parts and service may require extra European aid. Offer available for a limited time only. Void where prohibited by pre-emptive nuclear strike. |
| Posted by: Zenster 2007-05-04 11:26 |
| #3 Zenster, ready for prime time. But, you forgot the disclaimer, and the 'turbans and detonators sold separately' statement. |
| Posted by: wxjames 2007-05-04 10:34 |
| #2 *giggle* Cute, Zenster. |
| Posted by: trailing wife 2007-05-04 05:28 |
| #1 Allah Akbomb. |
| Posted by: newc 2007-05-04 00:53 |