An elected official charged with falsely claiming he earned the military's highest honor has filed a motion to dismiss the federal case against him on free speech grounds. The motion argues that the Stolen Valor Act of 2005, under which water board member Xavier Alvarez was charged, is incompatible with the First Amendment because it restricts free speech by criminalizing false claims of military honors.
| Some people have no shame. |
Alvarez, an elected representative to the Three Valleys Municipal Water District, said last year at a water district meeting that he was awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor for his deeds as a Marine. After admitting he never served in the military, he was charged with violating the Stolen Valor Act. He pleaded not guilty to the misdemeanor charge.
Alvarez's lawyer Brianna J. Fuller argued in the motion to dismiss, which will be heard Jan. 14 in federal court, that "protecting the reputation of military decorations" is not a compelling enough reason to place "restrictions on false statements."
But government prosecutors said in their opposition submitted Wednesday that the First Amendment does not protect deliberate falsehoods.
"Perry, this is Mr. Alvarez."
"How do you do, Mr. Alvarez? Have a seat, please. What can we do for you?"
"I got arrested for sayin' I got the Medal of Honor."
"And do you?"
"No. I ain't even been in da military, much less da Marines."
"I see. Della, would you ask Paul Drake to step in?"
"Of course, Perry."
"You wanted to see me, Perry?"
"Paul, this is Mr. Alvarez. He was arrested for making a false claim of having the Medal of Honor."
"I see. [SLAP!]"
"Owwwww!"
"Thank you, Paul."
"You're welcome, Perry."
"Owww! What wuz dat all about?"
"It's against bar association rules for an attorney to slap his client upside the head."
"Owwww! He hits hard!"
"That's why I pay him that much. Count yourself lucky. I used to use Mike Hammer."
"Okay. I'm lucky. Is my ear bleeding?"
"Not very much. Now, I think what we should do is argue that trying to pass yourself off as a Medal of Honor winner when you're actually just a piece of crap is covered by the First Amendment, making it a matter of freedom of speech."
"Youse think that'll get me off?"
"Of course not. But it's a stupid enough argument that they'll probably just send you to have your head examined, rather than actually sending you to the calaboose."
"Perry, you're a genius!"
"Thank you, Della. And you have a nice rack. Make sure his check's good before we do anything else on this case." |
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