 That super-soft toilet paper you're fond of using? It's an ecological disaster, environmentalists say.
Millions of trees are harvested throughout the Americas -- including rare old-growth forests in Canada -- to sustain the United States' obsession with quilted, ultra-soft, multi-ply toilet paper, the New York Times reported.
| The Times owns a lot of forest land used to generate paper pulp. Wonder if that is also wrong ... |
Although toilet paper manufacturers could produce products from recycled materials at a similar cost, the newspaper reported, the fiber taken from standing trees are necessary to help give the tissue its fluffy feel. "No forest of any kind should be used to make toilet paper," said Dr. Allen Hershkowitz, a senior scientist and waste expert with the Natural Resource Defense Council told the Times.
| Some expert. Trees are grown specifically for this. Fast growing trees like poplar or pine are harvested. Saying that we shouldn't harvest trees is like saying we shouldn't harvest wheat ... |
| What year do they cover what "should" be in scientist school? |
The United States is the largest market for toilet paper in the world, the newspaper reported,
| That sounds about right. We've got a lot of assholes running around telling the rest of us how things "should" be... |
but tissue from 100 percent recycled fibers makes up less than 2 percent of sales for at-home use among conventional and premium brands. People from other countries throughout Europe and Latin America are far less picky about what they use to wipe.
| Shed a tear of sympathy for the French when they poop... |
| No wonder they're so grumpy ... |
"This is a product that we use for less than three seconds and the ecological consequences of manufacturing it from trees is enormous," Hershkowitz told the Guardian newspaper, which cited the chemicals used in pulp manufacturing and process of cutting down forests. "Future generations are going to look at the way we make toilet paper as one of the greatest excesses of our age," Hershkowitz said. "Making toilet paper from virgin wood is a lot worse than driving Hummers in terms of global warming pollution."
| Professor Heshkowitz no doubt keeps a supply of pebbles in his WC for scraping the leftovers from between his cheeks, like the Arabs are reputed to use. Periodically he has to call in a plumber at $80 an hour, minimum one hour, subsequent billing in half hour increments, to blast the pebbles out of his sustainable housing's plumbing. |
However, hope is on the horizon,
| Yes, Brethren and Sistern! A new hope! Paging Luke Skywiper! Luke Skywiper to the brown courtesy phone! |
if Hollywood is any indicator. The Times reported the Academy Awards ceremony last weekend used 100 percent recycled toilet paper at the Kodak Theater's restrooms.
| And since we all wanna be just like Gollywood stars we're gonna use 100 percent recycled bumwipe from now on, you betcha. |
| Explains the tears during the awards ... |
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