Oh my goodness, where do I begin?An in-development Microsoft smart phone app designed to help drivers and pedestrians avoid unsafe neighborhoods is proving controversial among some minority rights groups that find the software potentially discriminatory.
But I like to discriminate against criminals. It's supposed to be a free country, isn't it?
The as-of-yet unnamed product is being referred to as the "Avoid The Ghetto" app by those who are concerned with where it will guide users.
Boy, that sure does sound racist. I wonder who coined it. I don't wonder why.
"I'm going to be up in arms about it if it happens," said Dallas NAACP President Juanita Wallace.
You really ought to take that NAACP off your business card. It doesn't help being associated with a blatantly racist organization.
She's up in arms and it hasn't yet happened. What will she do for an encore?
Wallace spent her afternoon at a rally on Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd. and said she felt safe there, but fears the app may project otherwise.
I live in Dallas. Not sure I would feel safe there.
I'm not trying to avoid MLK Blvd, I'm trying to avoid crime-ridden areas. How could you possibly make this connection, you racist bi+ch?
"Can you imagine me not being able to go to MLK Blvd. because my GPS says that's a dangerous crime area? I can't even imagine that," she said.
Yes, I can imagine that. I can also imagine turning it off if I think the statistics are incorrect. And I'm sure that Microslop will include an automatic "update" feature that will allow mistakes to be corrected as time goes on.
Microsoft says the app will use crime statistics to determine what parts of town are to be avoided. But it's unclear where the data will come from and how it will be interpreted.
I wonder if Microslop could set up some kind of credit exchange system where mayors can buy and sell "Crime Credits" to offset negative crime statistics. Of course, Microsoft would get to distribute them to mayors who offer the most generous credit-sale kickbacks and political concessions, on top of getting a percentage of every trade. That wouldn't be unethical, would it?
Microsoft has filed a patent for the app, but the actual product is unnamed and not available yet.
How about the "Never Access Any Criminal Places" button? That ought to get a few panties and handkerchiefs in a bunch.
Opponents like Wallace fear it could hurt minority communities.
Most everything hurts minority communities...
Or help people who don't like shooting people or being shot at.
"It's almost like gerrymandering," she said. "It's stereotyping for sure and without a doubt; I can't emphasize enough, it's discriminatory."
My, aren't we sensitive about some area of town that in all likelihood is far, far away from where you live.
Michael McNally, who was visiting Dallas Tuesday, said an app shouldn't have enough power to label a community.
I'd say the statistics label the community, and the community drives the statistics. Unless the problem-causing elements commute in from far away, of course.
"It may have a high crime problem but have some great cultural, social things you can do there," McNally said.
As long as you or your kids don't wear something other than grey, maybe.
Dallas resident Chris Hurst said it sounds like a good safety tool.
Surely Chris is white. Surely ....
"I'd be all for it because you can never be too safe," he said.
Or too alive.
Tommy Jones, who works downtown, said an app like Microsoft's could hurt a city's economy.
Like the drug trade? Somehow, I can imagine ways in which the app could end up helping the local "economy".
"From a business standpoint, it could be devastating," he said. "Especially in the area of tourism."
"Tourism". Riiight. OK, everyone, from now on we're calling it "tourism". Snicker.
Economic development is a major initiative that Mayor Mike Rawlings is pushing in parts of the city that the app may suggest against visiting.
Pushing police patrols, maybe?
Wallace is concerned this type of technology would continue to perpetuate stereotypes in Dallas and beyond.
Anything but fix the problem. Anything.
"What happens in North Dallas certainly ought to be no different than what happens in South Dallas, so we can't keep on doing this," she said. "This type of technology is certainly going to pronounce and heighten it to some degree."
Yeah, North and South Dallas certainly ought to have similar statistics. Whose statistics would you rather have where you live? But that is neither here nor there, since this isn't a liberal Utopia. this is reality. And when drugs offer a better living than the economy can provide, people will go there. And if they have to go there, I prefer that it be contained in some place that I can easily avoid. And if you don't think it's fair, then go live in that neighborhood and vote accordingly.
Microsoft declined to comment, issuing a statement that said the company "does not comment on filed or awarded patents."
I guess we'll never hear about any other products they ever intend to make or have made, either.