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-Lurid Crime Tales-
Robbery victim wants to thank Good Samaritans who came to his rescue
2013-01-13
[KHOU] A couple of strangers came to the rescue when a man was robbed at gunpoint. Now, the victim wants to say thank you to the Good Samaritans.

Police believe the criminal who was canvassing a neighborhood in the 2500 block of Wichita near Hermann Park had no idea what he was in for when he picked his target.
"Hmmm... This 'un looks like an easy touch! Prosperous, too..."
The victim in this case had just walked back to his car from a bar around the corner.
"Shay! Izzat my car? I shink [hic!] it might be!"
Kevin Dorsey says he hadn't even closed his car door Thursday night when a man wearing all black and a ski mask put a gun to his chest. The man took Dorsey's wallet, cell phone and car keys.
"Shay! Nice ski mashk!"
"Gimme yer dough! And yer car keys! And yer phone!"

After he was robbed, Dorsey began running down the street and says two men in a Mercedes asked him what had happened.
"Hey, you! Thop, stief!"
"Hey, buddy! Wossa motta?"

Dorsey told them and they not only caught up with the suspect, but they started shooting at him.
"There he is, Mel! The guy dressed in black with the ski mask!"
"You sure that's the guy?"
"Yep!"
[BANG!]

The suspect fired back.
[BANG!]
[BANG! BANG! BANGETY BANG!]

In the end, the two witnesses turned vigilantes won and took down the bad guy.
"Aaaaiiieeee!"
"I think I winged 'im, Mel!"

"I don't believe in guns," said Dorsey.
"I like being regarded as easy meat for street lice. That's why I drink."
"I don't own a gun. I'm totally at the mercy of my saviors.
More like being at the mercy of the predators. Unless he's referring to Savior, capitalized and singular. Or he's some kinda polytheist and has multiple.
They obviously sent two angels to help me.
I think I'm going with the polytheist idea.
These people protected me when I wouldn't couldn't protect myself."
That's why we have people named Mel and Herb who pack heat.
After the robber had been shot, police say he jumped over a fence and was attacked by a German Shepherd.
"Awww! Spit! Nize doggy!"
[GRRR! CHOMP! SHAKE!]
"Aaaaiiieee! I am undone!"

That attack prevented him from getting away.
German shepherds do that, y'know.
The suspect, identified as Christopher Hutchins, is being treated at Ben Taub Hospital. He's expected to recover.
Too bad.
Posted by:Fred

#8  "'I don't believe in guns,' said Dorsey."

You believed in the one the robber stuck in your chest. Why didn't you just tell him you don't believe in guns and go on about your business?
Posted by: Barbara   2013-01-13 20:50  

#7  "I don't believe in guns," said Dorsey.
But I bet he believes in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny.
Posted by: Deacon Blues   2013-01-13 17:53  

#6  A pack. Not a herd.
Posted by: BrerRabbit   2013-01-13 17:26  

#5  While this story has received national attention, including the Drudge Report, here in Houston where it happened the story was not even the lede. Mel and Herb having some weekend fun. Nothing to see here, move along.
Posted by: BrujoTejano   2013-01-13 12:04  

#4  Mel and Herb should apply for one of the many Crossfire training courses held at random intervals by the RAB to eliminate those taxpayer funded miscreant hospitalizations.
Posted by: USN,Ret.   2013-01-13 10:50  

#3  Obviously, the Samaritans' tools were lacking in sufficient capacity.
Posted by: Procopius2k   2013-01-13 09:24  

#2  I want a German Shepherd now, perhaps one trained to use an assault rifle.
Posted by: Shipman   2013-01-13 07:20  

#1  You heard about the joke with the robber, a drunk, two guys packing heat, and a German shepherd? This one will kill yuh!
Posted by: Alaska Paul    2013-01-13 00:40  

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