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#1 The story reminds me of the idiot who hijacked a truck in Baltimore, and drove South on the Baltimore-Washington Parkway to try to escape. When he passed Odenton, he decided to pull off at the next exit, at Route 32. Those of you in the area have guessed what happened next, I'm sure.
The man couldn't read, I am guessing, or he would have known not to take the 'NSA Employees Only' exit. At least he did have the minimal intelligence not to try to overrun the Army unit with the machine guns.