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#1 I went to the link to see the rest of the Onion. Is there an alternate fools-day in the UK maybe? This can't be real.
Posted by Shipman 2012-12-29 04:06||
#2 Group punishment for all because the establishment cannot be bothered to solve the problem (by seperating the anti-social).
Posted by Bright Pebbles 2012-12-29 07:34||
#3 Last argument I had in a kitchen was a very long time ago...
Posted by Solomon Protector of the Texans5923 2012-12-29 07:49||
#4 Don't know about the stats in the UK, but around 100,000 patients die every year from preventable causes in hospitals. That dwarfs killings and auto deaths, but somehow doesn't seem to make the front page or first five minutes of the propaganda broadcast. Doctor, heal thyself.
Posted by P2Kontheroad 2012-12-29 08:46||
#5 but there are no murders in the british utopia...they have strict gun laws (sniff)
Posted by dan 2012-12-29 08:49||
#6 Anyone ever try to chop a large onion with a square ended knife?
Possible, yes. Easy, no. You use the point of the chefs knife to start the cut that runs from close to the root end. Make 4 or so cuts that way, slice across and then chop.
Much easier than any other knife.
Posted by AlanC 2012-12-29 08:49||
#7 Kitchen knives? More like kitchen knaves. Give me a break. I recall when Michael Skakel, a Kennedy, was convicted in the beating of a teenage girl to death with a golf club in Belle Haven, Connecticut, in 1975. Good thing Skakel didn't head to a school with a full set of golf clubs.
Posted by JohnQC 2012-12-29 09:33||
#8 This was a running joke for a while on the 'burg that next they would ban knives since they had banned guns. Looks like we were prophets. Next they'll ban cricket bats, bricks, pipes, wood and rocks.
Posted by DarthVader 2012-12-29 10:19||
Posted by Beavis 2012-12-29 10:34||
#10 ... there was a 57 per cent increase in deaths caused by punching and kicking.
Bringing a new chilling meaning to the irrational concept of 'to disarm' the public.
Posted by P2kontheroad 2012-12-29 10:55||
#11 No problem P2 - simply lop off arms and legs at birth (and remove teeth later on). As a bonus the person will then also be totally dependent on the government - guaranteed vote!
What's not to like?
Posted by CrazyFool 2012-12-29 11:12||
#12 Once again...check the date:
Thursday, 26 May, 2005
Posted by tu3031 2012-12-29 12:14||
#13 Offensive weapons are defined as any weapon designed or adapted to cause injury, or intended by the person possessing them to do so.
IOW, if someone intended to cause injury with say, a spork, it could be considered an "Offensive Weapon". It sorta makes sense when you consider that any object that can't cause injury makes a pretty shitty weapon - offensive or otherwise.
Posted by DepotGuy 2012-12-29 12:21||
#14 Are you kidding me, I could turn a plastic bucket into a lethel weapon, nevermind someone just fashioning a shiv.
And I think there was talk about banning baseball bats. Something about the familiarity of a cricket bat, at less weight, and more portable.
Knives are illegal in prisons, yet people still manage to have blades. Its almost like bad people figure out ways to hurt people no matter what.
Posted by swksvolFF 2012-12-29 12:37||
#15 Once again...check the date:
I was going to note that at the beginning of the article, but forgot. The point of posting it was to show up a particular British commenter who sniffed to the effect that 'gun murders don't happen' in Albion.
Posted by Pappy 2012-12-29 12:56||
#16 If they come for my Zwillings, there'll be h*ll to pay.
Posted by Mullah Richard 2012-12-29 13:02||
#17 Death by Slap Choppy!
ban Vince Shlomi!
Posted by Frank G 2012-12-29 13:40||
#18 Sharpened pencils, threat or menace?
Posted by tu3031 2012-12-29 23:43||