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2004-12-29 Afghanistan/South Asia
'No country has pre-emptive strike right'
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Posted by Fred 2004-12-29 00:00:00|| || Front Page|| [8 views since 2007-05-07]  Top

#1 Bad country! No biscuit!
Posted by Dar  2004-12-29 12:03:58 AM||   2004-12-29 12:03:58 AM|| Front Page Top

#2 ..and today it needed moderate Islam after 9/11 the tragedy.

How does one "need" something that hasn't been proven to exist in sufficient quantity to be of any benefit?
Posted by Bomb-a-rama 2004-12-29 12:25:52 AM||   2004-12-29 12:25:52 AM|| Front Page Top

#3 â€˜No country has pre-emptive strike right’

Pakistan should find their ringside seat quite handy for learning a lesson from what's about to happen with Iran.
Posted by Zenster 2004-12-29 12:26:14 AM||   2004-12-29 12:26:14 AM|| Front Page Top

#4 Yeah, we're out there suppressing freedom stuggles all over the place. It's what we're best known for, er, that and cable TV with titties and ass.

Fred - I have a version of your comment...
"Life is hard. It's a lot harder if you're stupid."

I'm guessing that the logic makes life pretty much impossible for old Khan, here.
Posted by .com 2004-12-29 5:33:14 AM||   2004-12-29 5:33:14 AM|| Front Page Top

#5 "Life is hard. It's a lot harder if you're stupid."

My favorite is:

"Stupidity should be painful."
Posted by Zenster 2004-12-29 5:36:29 AM||   2004-12-29 5:36:29 AM|| Front Page Top

#6 Oooh I know, I know! That's attributed to Mother Nature, right? Lol! "Doctor it hurts when I do this..."

I used to use email stationary created from this image...
Posted by .com 2004-12-29 5:50:59 AM||   2004-12-29 5:50:59 AM|| Front Page Top

#7 My favourite quote is
“Stupidity cannot be cured with money, or through education, or by legislation. Stupidity is not a sin, the victim can't help being stupid. But stupidity is the only universal capital crime; the sentence is death, there is no appeal and execution is carried out automatically and without pity.”
from the great Robert Anson Heinlein.
Posted by Tony (UK)  2004-12-29 6:41:50 AM||   2004-12-29 6:41:50 AM|| Front Page Top

#8 Mine is from the Devil's Dictionary:
IDIOT, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. The Idiot's activity is not confined to any special field of thought or action, but "pervades and regulates the whole." He has the last word in everything; his decision is unappealable. He sets the fashions and opinion of taste, dictates the limitations of speech and circumscribes conduct with a dead-line.
Posted by Weird Al 2004-12-29 7:34:32 AM||   2004-12-29 7:34:32 AM|| Front Page Top

#9 I smell Rantburg Classic™!

Keep 'em coming, folks. After the last few days, I'm pretty sure all of us could use a little comic relief.

A few more:

My boss is so stupid, move his plate six inches and he'll starve.

This guy I know is so stupid, he thought Shakespeare was an African fight scene.
[an original]

My neighbor's momma is so stupid, it takes her two hours to watch "60 Minutes."

Posted by Zenster 2004-12-29 8:05:38 AM||   2004-12-29 8:05:38 AM|| Front Page Top

#10 Weird Al - I always enjoyed TDD's entry for Logic & Infidel...

INFIDEL, n. In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople, one who does. A kind of scoundrel imperfectly reverent of, and niggardly contributory to, divines, ecclesiastics, popes, parsons, canons, monks, mollahs, voodoos, presbyters, hierophants, prelates, obeah-men, abbes, nuns, missionaries, exhorters, deacons, friars, hadjis, high-priests, muezzins, brahmins, medicine-men, confessors, eminences, elders, primates, prebendaries, pilgrims, prophets, imaums, beneficiaries, clerks, vicars-choral, archbishops, bishops, abbots, priors, preachers, padres, abbotesses, caloyers, palmers, curates, patriarchs, bonezs, santons, beadsmen, canonesses, residentiaries, diocesans, deans, subdeans, rural deans, abdals, charm-sellers, archdeacons, hierarchs, class-leaders, incumbents, capitulars, sheiks, talapoins, postulants, scribes, gooroos, precentors, beadles, fakeers, sextons, reverences, revivalists, cenobites, perpetual curates, chaplains, mudjoes, readers, novices, vicars, pastors, rabbis, ulemas, lamas, sacristans, vergers, dervises, lectors, church wardens, cardinals, prioresses, suffragans, acolytes, rectors, cures, sophis, mutifs and pumpums.

LOGIC, n. The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding. The basic of logic is the syllogism, consisting of a major and a minor premise and a conclusion -- thus:

Major Premise: Sixty men can do a piece of work sixty times as quickly as one man.

Minor Premise: One man can dig a posthole in sixty seconds; therefore --

Conclusion: Sixty men can dig a posthole in one second.

This may be called the syllogism arithmetical, in which, by combining logic and mathematics, we obtain a double certainty and are twice blessed.
Posted by .com 2004-12-29 8:25:19 AM||   2004-12-29 8:25:19 AM|| Front Page Top

#11 I knew I kept this file for a reason:

Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.

Minds are like parachutes. They work best when open. Just make sure the strings are still attached.

Indecision is the key to flexibility.

I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
Posted by Steve  2004-12-29 8:39:00 AM||   2004-12-29 8:39:00 AM|| Front Page Top

#12 Steve - The last one comes from Mae West... More by Mae:

So many men, so little time.

It's not the men in my life; it's the life in my men.

Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.

I only like two kinds of men: domestic and foreign.

Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.

I've been in more laps than a napkin.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.

He who hesitates is a damned fool.

She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.

I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.

Too much of a good thing is wonderful.

Once, during a trial in which she was accused of indecency on stage, the judge asked, "Miss West, are you trying to show contempt for this court?"
She answered, "On the contrary, your Honor, I was doin' my best to conceal it."

I've been rich and I've been poor. Believe me, rich is better.

I always say, keep a diary, and some day it'll keep you.

It ain't no sin if you crack a few laws now and then. As long as you don't break any.

It's better to be looked over than overlooked.

Maid (unpacking): Goodness, what nice jewelry.
Mae West: "Goodness" had nothing to do with it, dearie.

When I'm good, I'm good. When I'm bad, I'm very good.

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
Posted by .com 2004-12-29 8:52:17 AM||   2004-12-29 8:52:17 AM|| Front Page Top

#13 And some more unattributed items just for the helluvit.

1. I can please only one person per day.
Today is not your day.
Tomorrow isn't looking good, either.

2. I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

3. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, "Where the hell is the ceiling?"

4. I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound as they go by.

5. Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do.

6. If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?

7. Am I getting smart with you? ... How would you know?

8. The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.

9. I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves.

10. I'm not just a gardener, I'm a Plant Manager.

11. My Reality Check bounced.

12. Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: How many can you afford?

13. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

14. I have not yet begun to procrastinate.

15. You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

16. I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.

17. I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

18. There are two rules for ultimate success in life.
1. Never tell everything you know.
2.

19. Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

20. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

21. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

22. Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car.
Posted by .com 2004-12-29 8:57:02 AM||   2004-12-29 8:57:02 AM|| Front Page Top

#14 And these... Deep Thoughts Contest

-- From a newspaper contest where entrants were asked to imitate "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey"

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

My young son asked me what happens after we die. I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies. I guess I should have told him the truth--that most of us go to Hell and burn eternally--but I didn't want to upset him.

It sure would be nice if we got a day off for the president's birthday, like they do for the queen. Of course, then we would have a lot of people voting for a candidate born on July 3 or December 26, just for the long weekends.

Democracy is a beautiful thing, except for that part about letting just any old yokel vote.

Home is where the house is.

Often, when I am reading a good book, I stop and thank my teacher. That is, I used to, until she got an unlisted number.

As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up.

It would be terrible if the Red Cross Bloodmobile got into an accident. No, wait. That would be good because if anyone needed it, the blood would be right there.

Give me the strength to change the things I can, the grace to accept the things I cannot, and a great big bag of money.

The people who think Tiny Tim is strange are the same ones who think it odd that I drive without pants.

For centuries, people thought the moon was made of green cheese. Then the astronauts found that the moon is really a big hard rock. That's what happens to cheese when you leave it out.

Think of the biggest number you can. Now add five. Then, imagine if you had that many Twinkies. Wow, that's five more than the biggest number you could come up with!

I bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.

The only stupid question is the one that is never asked, except maybe "Don't you think it is about time you audited my return?" or "Isn't is morally wrong to give me a warning when, in fact, I was speeding?"

Once, I wept for I had no shoes. Then I came upon a man who had no feet. So I took his shoes. I mean, it's not like he really needed them, right?

When I go to heaven, I want to see my grandpa again. But he better have lost the nose hair and the old-man smell.

I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?

I often wonder how come John Tesh isn't as popular a singer as some people think he should be. Then, I remember it's because he sucks.

Whenever I start getting sad about where I am in my life, I think about the last words of my favorite uncle: "A truck!"

If you really want to impress people with your computer literacy, add the words "dot com" to the end of everything you say, dot com.

I like to go down to the dog pound and pretend that I've found my dog. Then I tell them to kill it anyway because I already gave away all of his stuff. Dog people sure don't have a sense of humor.

THIRD RUNNER UP

I don't know about you, but I enjoy watching paint dry. I imagine that the wet paint is a big freshwater lake that is the only source of water for some tiny cities by the lake. As the lake gets drier, the population gets more desperate, and sometimes there are water riots. Once there was a big fire and everyone died.

SECOND RUNNER UP

I once heard the voice of God. It said "Vrrrrmmmmm." Unless it was just a lawn mower.

FIRST RUNNER UP

I gaze at the brilliant full moon. The same one, I think to myself, at which Socrates, Aristotle, and Plato gazed. Suddenly, I imagine they appear beside me. I tell Socrates about the national debate over one's right to die and wonder at the constancy of the human condition. I tell Plato that I live in the country that has come the closest to Utopia, and I show him a copy of the Constitution. I tell Aristotle that we have found many more than four basic elements and I show him a periodic table. I get a box of kitchen matches and strike one. They gasp with wonder. We spend the rest of the night lighting farts.

WINNER

If we could just get everyone to close their eyes and visualize world peace for an hour, imagine how serene and quiet it would be until the looting started.
Posted by .com 2004-12-29 8:58:17 AM||   2004-12-29 8:58:17 AM|| Front Page Top

#15 "international law as shaped after World War II does not recognise any country’s right to launch a pre-emptive strike"

What an irresponsible, asinine, and unresearched statement by this moronic, Khan. Here is an direct quote from the U.N, of all places, favoring pre-emptive strikes. I am going to leave links, for any stoooopid extreme liberal and/or facist pigs, with their head in the EUROhole.

Although implicitly criticising the US "war on terror", the report recognises the international community needs to be concerned about the "nightmare scenarios combining terrorists, weapons of mass destruction and irresponsible states and much more besides, which may conceivably justify the use of force, not just reactively, but preventively and before a latent threat becomes imminent".

Concerning Chilean dictatorship:
'"an 'independent' rational socialist state linked to Cuba and the USSR can be even more dangerous for our long-term interests than a radical regime'"

Concerning Russia, Pooty states:
"If the principle of preventive use of force continues to develop in international practice, then Russia reserves the right to act in an analogous manner to defend its national interests,"

Concerning Japan, notice the words "since WWII":
"The Japanese Prime Minister, Junichiro Koizumi, has indicated his country would be prepared to make a pre-emptive strike against a foreign threat, adopting the most strident position by a Japanese leader since World War II."

It looks like a "International body" to me.
Well Khan, not very well researched, are you. Your just jealous that you are maybe 6th on the list, instead on 1st, as a candidate for the receiveing end of pre-emptive strikes. Go and do some more research, Mr. Editor-in-Chief of spreading propaganda, and get back with the world with some facts.
Posted by Poison Reverse 2004-12-29 9:21:22 AM||   2004-12-29 9:21:22 AM|| Front Page Top

#16 If you're gonna be stupid, you've gotta be tough.
Two wrongs don't make a right but to Wrights can make an airplane.
Posted by Deacon Blues  2004-12-29 9:23:34 AM||   2004-12-29 9:23:34 AM|| Front Page Top

#17 Proof that stupidity can be a capital offense.
Posted by Korora  2004-12-29 9:48:53 AM|| [http://basementburrow.blogspot.com]  2004-12-29 9:48:53 AM|| Front Page Top

#18 "The forces of evil will always defeat the forces of good, because good is dumb."

-space balls
Posted by Jarhead 2004-12-29 10:32:39 AM||   2004-12-29 10:32:39 AM|| Front Page Top

#19 Korora... here's one related I just found.

"The truth is always a trick to those who live among lies."

Then it sez... go away. Purdy bizarre.
Posted by Shipman 2004-12-29 10:54:51 AM||   2004-12-29 10:54:51 AM|| Front Page Top

#20 Ok. We'll be sorry afterward, and will not watch TV (as a penance) for a week.
Posted by gromgorru  2004-12-29 10:58:32 AM||   2004-12-29 10:58:32 AM|| Front Page Top

#21 gromgorru - If we're going to have to pay a penance, shouldn't we be forced to watch more TV? ;-p
Posted by Barbara Skolaut  2004-12-29 11:59:35 AM||   2004-12-29 11:59:35 AM|| Front Page Top

#22 The only plan is: there is no plan.
Posted by mojo  2004-12-29 12:28:36 PM||   2004-12-29 12:28:36 PM|| Front Page Top

#23 Not to add insult to injury but here's a few by Pudd'nhead Wilson, as related by Mark Twain, Mae West without the hips.

A man may have no bad habits and have worse.

When in doubt, tell the truth.

It is more trouble to make a maxim than it is to do right.

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn’t.

Man is the Only Animal that Blushes. Or needs to.

“Classic.” A book which people praise and don’t read.

Truth is the most valuable thing we have. Let us economize it.

It is your human environment that makes climate.

Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.

There are several good protections against temptations, but the surest is cowardice.

To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man’s, I mean.

There are two times in a man’s lift when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.

In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made School Boards.

The principle difference between a cat and a lie is that the cat has only nine lives.

Posted by Ken Radovsky 2004-12-29 3:04:27 PM|| [http://www.redlinesystems.net]  2004-12-29 3:04:27 PM|| Front Page Top

#24 Another from TDD, off subject, but too good to ignore:
CANNON, n. An instrument employed in the rectification of national boundaries.
Posted by Weird Al 2004-12-29 3:23:47 PM||   2004-12-29 3:23:47 PM|| Front Page Top

#25 And:
MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be. His chief occupation is extermination of other animals and his own species, which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest the whole habitable earth and Canada.
Posted by Weird Al 2004-12-29 3:26:58 PM||   2004-12-29 3:26:58 PM|| Front Page Top

#26 In the spirit of The Devil's Dictionary:

Reason: A term originally used by philosophers, but of unknown meaning, since the philosophers could never agree on what it meant. (Nor could they, in spite of using reason, agree on anything else.) Later taken up in popular usage to mean the form of thinking you engage in, whereas your opponent doesn't.

Rationalist: A person who believes that his view of how the world works is based on reason, in spite of the fact that other rationalists have entirely different views about how the world works. (See for example, Politics).
Posted by HV 2004-12-29 6:42:45 PM||   2004-12-29 6:42:45 PM|| Front Page Top

20:53 Anonymoose
20:53 Anonymoose
20:52 Anonymoose
20:52 Anonymoose
22:45 .com
22:41 joeblow
22:30 Classical_Liberal
22:20 Frank G
22:18 ex-lib
22:17 Angash Elminelet3775
22:15 badanov
22:09 Frank G
22:07 Frank G
22:02 Sock Puppet of Doom
22:02 .com
22:01 smn
22:00 .com
21:57 smn
21:55 smn
21:50 Tom
21:46 ex-lib
21:45 Asedwich
21:38 Mark Z.
21:37 Matt









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