Submit your comments on this article |
Israel-Palestine |
Police plan piggish counter-terrorism psychological warfare |
2004-02-12 |
No comment, out of my league The police are considering using bags of lard in buses and other places to deter Moslem suicide bombers. The police are going to begin implementing their plan to hang bags of swine fat in buses and other public places, in the hope it will deter suicide bombers from entering them. The suggestion is based on the fact that Islam, like Judaism, regards the pig as an unclean animal. Strict Moslem tradition holds that any Moslem who touches a pig before dying will be denied access to heaven. The main way of recruiting suicide bombers, many of whom are religiously observant Moslems, is the assurance that as martyrs (shahids) their place in paradise is guaranteed, assuring them seventy willing virgins will be at their beck and call, according to Moslem tradition. The police thought of using pigs or pork products to ward off terrorism months ago, but needed a rabbinical permit to carry it out, so as not to offend Jewish sensibilities. Rabbi Eliezer Moshe Fisher, of the Jerusalem Rabbinical Court, ruled on Wednesday that âthere is no halachic ban on using bags of lard in buses and other placesâ when saving lives is concerned. The halachic permit says bags of lard may be used in any place that might be a target for suicide bombings, such as schools, shopping malls, railway stations etc. The rabbi also said that if the police do not use pig fat in buses, tens of thousands of ultra-Orthodox Jews will arm themselves with spray guns filled with liquid lard, which they will spray on terrorists whenever the need arises. Deputy Defense Minister MK Yaâakov Edri came out in support of the new idea. If bags of pig lard will prevent zealous Moslem terrorists from carrying out attacks, Iâm all for itâ, he said. |
Posted by:tipper |
#15 I knew it. One of these days I would hear of flying pigs. I suppose dropping lard and fat from f16's on Paleo territory would really rile them up though. Go to their superstitions. |
Posted by: dataman1 2004-2-12 5:21:24 PM |
#14 especially after about the third day in the hot Negev sun... Old Patriot A little geography correction, the security fence/wall is not in the Negev it will be the Judea and Samaria sun :) |
Posted by: The Dodo 2004-2-12 3:57:43 PM |
#13 "Don't you think someone will complain about the smell?" "Ah, don't worry. You'd never smell it over the palestinians." |
Posted by: BH 2004-2-12 2:58:20 PM |
#12 On the other hand spraying pig fat on the PA side of the security fence seems a promising idea. Might want to apply a liberal coating of pig fat to the fence every few weeks. Not only will it keep away the paleos, it'll also keep away just about everything else - especially after about the third day in the hot Negev sun... |
Posted by: Old Patriot 2004-2-12 2:55:18 PM |
#11 In the spirit of the article: Here's a little song about four wet pigs Here's a little song about four wet pigs Two of 'em little and two of 'em big They danced all night at the Pigtown Jig The two that were little were just half-grown The two that were big were big as a barn Big as a barn and tall as a tree Took 'em right down to the factory Slice 'em into bacon, chop 'em into ham Roll 'em into hot dogs, squeeze 'em into Spam* Throw their little eyes out in the rain Pickle their feet and scramble their brains Here's a little song about two wet pigs Standin' by the slop trough, smokin' their cigs Hopin' to God that they never get big They danced all night at the Pigtown Jig |
Posted by: Alaska Paul 2004-2-12 2:00:29 PM |
#10 Bad idea to hang bags of fat in buses. Pig fat really really smells bad when it decomposes. On the other hand spraying pig fat on the PA side of the security fence seems a promising idea. |
Posted by: mhw 2004-2-12 1:39:18 PM |
#9 Classic, this idea. |
Posted by: Korora 2004-2-12 1:23:05 PM |
#8 tens of thousands of ultra-Orthodox Jews will arm themselves with spray guns filled with liquid lard, which they will spray on terrorists whenever the need arises. The image this conjures up is astonishing..... Maybe we should arm our men in Iraq with lard squirt guns..... |
Posted by: CrazyFool 2004-2-12 1:12:06 PM |
#7 Then have the Jews create and mass produce "Lucky Charms" that "protect" the heathens against the lard and turn a buck to help finance Israeli defenses. Of course they'll need a front company...hmmm how about Allah Industries? |
Posted by: 98Zulu 2004-2-12 12:04:39 PM |
#6 I wonder if it would be feasible on sorties to have bacon bits dropped on targets just before the bomb hits. |
Posted by: Lil Dhimmi 2004-2-12 11:04:39 AM |
#5 I think it's brilliant. Simple yet effective. |
Posted by: B 2004-2-12 10:41:12 AM |
#4 What would be really fun to see is if Israel announced that the next time one of these retards attacks them, they will fill a crop-duster with pig blood and lard and spray it over Gaza. Gross, but humane. Well, except for that whole "getting into heaven" thing. |
Posted by: BH 2004-2-12 10:38:59 AM |
#3 Strict Moslem tradition holds that any Moslem who touches a pig before dying will be denied access to heaven. Now there will be debates on whether the Islamokaze is technically dead before his shredded flesh mingles with that of the pig. Still, I like the whole "hang a clove of garlic" aspect of this. It really highlights Islam's status as a cult of evil. |
Posted by: BH 2004-2-12 10:33:39 AM |
#2 Islam is a fantasy religion...I think this is a great idea. While AHM's criticism may be true, it demonstrates the humanity of the Israelis in exhausting all options before resorting to deadly force in defending themselves. A trait which I find admirable, but ultimately (against Arabs) self-defeating. |
Posted by: mjh 2004-2-12 10:17:32 AM |
#1 That is ridiculous. Some f*cked up turban will just issue a fatwah that says suiciding yourself (which is already against islam) and killing jooos supercedes touching a pig. |
Posted by: AllahHateMe 2004-2-12 10:11:00 AM |