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Home Front: WoT |
The Pentagon’s Secret Scream |
2004-03-10 |
Those evil Zionists have let the military/industrial complex into their Secret Death Ray Lab. BWAAA HAAA HAAA HAAA SOUTH POMFRET, Vt. - Marines arriving in Iraq this month as part of a massive troop rotation will bring with them a high-tech weapon never before used in combat - or in peacekeeping. The device is a powerful megaphone the size of a satellite dish that can deliver recorded warnings in Arabic and, on command, emit a piercing tone so excruciating to humans, its boosters say, that it causes crowds to disperse, clears buildings and repels intruders. "[For] most people, even if they plug their ears, [the device] will produce the equivalent of an instant migraine," says Woody Norris, chairman of American Technology Corp., the San Diego firm that produces the weapon. "It will knock [some people] on their knees." |
Posted by:whitecollar redneck |
#11 Dial that baby to Slim Whitman level 3 and let there be peace on earth (and Mars). |
Posted by: Shipman 2004-3-10 5:45:19 PM |
#10 But its safe for pets! (except hamsters, gerbils and mice) |
Posted by: eLarson 2004-3-10 4:43:44 PM |
#9 Just fly a pair of F-111s over at full throttle, then hit the AB and stand the birds straight up. Between the noise and the backblast, half the people will be on their knees, and the rest suffering from excruciating headaches. The fact that the birds can come in at 50 feet, totally unannounced, and THEN pull this maneuver, makes certain that a large percentage of the crowd will have one objective - go home and change their stained undergarments. I have one suggestion: combine it with a laser-light show and project some 80-foot Marines coming over the barrier. Might as well do this right... |
Posted by: Old Patriot 2004-3-10 3:04:33 PM |
#8 emit a piercing tone so excruciating to humans that it causes crowds to disperse, clears buildings and repels intruders Must be the new Moby song |
Posted by: John C. Lately 2004-3-10 12:22:10 PM |
#7 Broadcasting Dean through the device would create the "Brown Noise" harmonics referred to in "South Park". Everyone within 500 meters would crap their pants. |
Posted by: whitecollar redneck 2004-3-10 12:20:27 PM |
#6 Could there be a market out there for smaller, personal sized, units like these? You know, for use against the kid with the boom box on his shoulder, or the car with the mega-watts base turned all the way up. Not to mention the guy behind you who hits the horn before the light turns green. Just a thought... |
Posted by: OldeForce 2004-3-10 12:19:36 PM |
#5 WHAT? Huh? Speak up Sonny! |
Posted by: JackAssFestival 2004-3-10 12:05:45 PM |
#4 If this device had fallen into the hands of the Howard Dean campaign, . . . . |
Posted by: Mike 2004-3-10 11:21:16 AM |
#3 I saw some coverage on this thing on Discovery; the operator barely hears a thing; it's a highly focused sound projector. If I recall correctly, you don't even have to worry about echoes. |
Posted by: Robert Crawford 2004-3-10 10:23:27 AM |
#2 Prolly gonna be deployed by the Deafies Brigade. |
Posted by: Shipman 2004-3-10 10:17:28 AM |
#1 Oops..EFL as well. |
Posted by: whitecollar redneck 2004-3-10 10:10:26 AM |