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| Hamster hero revives beloved pet | |
| 2004-07-30 | |
| Is it weird enough for you yet? Alex was the one with the justly famous see-through dress at Cannes. Would-be first daughter Alexandra Kerry revealed Thursday night that her father's habit of saving men overboard didn't end with his Swift Boat rescue of fellow Vietnam veteran Jim Rassman. In a bizarre recollection, Alexandra told the Democratic Convention crowd how the family waited dockside one summer day to embark on a trip, when the cage housing her sister's hamster "Licorice" tumbled into the drink. "My dad jumped in, grabbed an oar, fished the cage from the water, hunched over the soggy hamster and began to administer CPR," the Kerry daughter told the audience. "There are still to this day some reports of mouth-to-mouth, but I admit it's probably a trick of memory."
My oft-quoted animal companion, Roswell the Atomic Poodle, does not understand why anyone would revive a hamster instead of devouring it on the spot. Then again, Ros is not a liberal. | |
| Posted by:Atomic Conspiracy |
| #14 Oh, almost forgot an on-topic (sorta) picture I located... BTW, AFAIK, it could be a guinea pig - I have no expertise on rodentia other than ferrets... which are a scream! It was long ago, but mine was named Critter and kept the house in a near-riot all the time, not to mention phreaking out both my cat (British Blue) and dog (Weimaraner) - he scared the hell out of both of them, heh. |
| Posted by: .com 2004-07-30 10:38:36 PM |
| #13 Poodles, esp the unaltered full-size variety, are killer hunting dogs - the equal of any of the water dogs. The twits who worked so hard to wussify 'em, well, that's just a crime. Great dogs. I thought you'd get a kick out of the Serengeti / skeleton. No matter the outside appearance, they have hunter's hearts! |
| Posted by: .com 2004-07-30 10:30:25 PM |
| #12 Yeah. I mean, I have show dogs (not Poodles, two other breeds but even mine don't have colored nails. Neither do any of the Best in Show poodles who've been top winners in the last [insert number here] years. Ick. |
| Posted by: rkb 2004-07-30 9:48:45 PM |
| #11 Ok, ok, Pappy and rkb; even I can learn something every day. Poodles that actually engage in waterfowl hunting can be exempt from the Atomic Empire's new anti-poodle-shaving ordinance. Pink claws are still out, purple and plain red too. |
| Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy 2004-07-30 9:40:42 PM |
| #10 mucky, are we to understand that you're the new spokesperson for the sKerry campaign, 'cause no-one is as eloquent as you! |
| Posted by: GreatestJeneration 2004-07-30 7:47:09 PM |
| #9 Poodles were originally water retrievers (and more than one famous show line was known to bring in water fowl not all that long ago). This trim cuts down drag in the water while protecting lungs, heart and kidneys against the cold. |
| Posted by: rkb 2004-07-30 7:44:42 PM |
| #8 AC, poodles were 'groomed' in a similar fashion long ago, when they were hunting-dogs. Easier to find and treat wounds. The injuries healed better too. Pink claws, well, that's just... metrosexual. |
| Posted by: Pappy 2004-07-30 7:33:12 PM |
| #7 when the cage housing her sister’s hamster "Licorice" tumbled into the drink that in eether real tiny cage or purdy big drink. this in sweet story. kerry in learn alot em vietnam. he in deserve medal for this. |
| Posted by: muck4doo 2004-07-30 6:13:56 PM |
| #6 .com Whoever "groomed" those critters should be put in jail. Some years ago, my wife took Ros in for his semi-annual trimming (we keep his hair as natural as possible). The groomers inadvertantly gave him the full shaved poodle treatment, pink claws and all. I was horrified. He looked like a miniature drag queen. He did bag quite a few ground squirrels in that condition, though. Apparently the rodents just didn't take him seriously enough to flee. |
| Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy 2004-07-30 5:15:55 PM |
| #5 "...endorsement of the NAMHLA." Mercy! That gets my vote for Funniest Line of the Day. |
| Posted by: SteveS 2004-07-30 11:18:43 AM |
| #4 Well, he's just won the endorsement of the NAMHLA. |
| Posted by: BH 2004-07-30 10:42:58 AM |
| #3 The "love" between liberals and their hamsters...wink, wink... |
| Posted by: rex 2004-07-30 3:12:33 AM |
| #2 AC - I'll bet Ros is from much hardier stock*, heh. * 'Nevermore' is the name of the Photoshop wizard who created this image. |
| Posted by: .com 2004-07-30 3:06:34 AM |
| #1 When I was about 14 I did a chest massage on (what seemed to be) a dead kitten. Worked, too. I didn't learn that in Vietnam, though. I think it was on Medical Center. No mouths were involved. |
| Posted by: Angie Schultz 2004-07-30 1:17:16 AM |
