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Down Under
Australian R.S.L Wants European Tourists Deported
2004-11-26
TWO European backpackers who danced semi-naked around the eternal flame at Brisbane's Anzac Memorial should be deported, the RSL said today. RSL state president Bill Mason said ex-diggers were outraged after the two tourists received $700 fines for causing a public nuisance. The pair, who were arrested for taking photos of themselves burning books on the flame while dancing semi-naked in army fatigues, avoided deportation when a Brisbane magistrate today opted against recording a conviction. Mr Mason described the desecration as "soul destroying" and said the backpackers were let off too leniently. "The fact there was no conviction recorded astounds me," Mr Mason said. He called on Immigration Minister Amanda Vanstone to deport them even though the Polish man apologised.

German Andreas Benjamin Porzelt, 22, and his Polish friend Robert Weimann-Wojcik, 21, were arrested at 3am today after a member of the public witnessed the incident and rang police. Outside court, Mr Weimann-Wojcik said: "I was drunk and I say sorry to all Australian people... I am a guest in this country and I say sorry about this." The pair extinguished the flame after a four-hour drinking binge at the Down Under club in the city's Palace Backpackers hostel. They told police they had sculled tequila slammers, sambucca and jugs of beer before scaling a 2m-high wrought iron fence to get inside the memorial.

Mr Weimann-Wojcik apologised in court after being branded a disgrace by Brisbane Magistrate Jim Herlihy. Mr Herlihy told him he should've known the memorial also honoured the Poles who fought alongside Australians. "That memorial is important to a lot of Australians and you would be most disgusted if an Australian tourist came to your country and defaced a memorial to your fallen soldiers," Mr Herlihy also told Mr Porzelt.

The German traveller had to be helped in and out of the prison dock after limping heavily into court. He was later taken to Royal Brisbane Hospital emergency department for treatment of an ankle injury sustained in the jump over the wall. Legal aid lawyer Michael Maloney told the court police had no evidence of a pagan ritual despite pictures depicting the pair burning books. Mr Maloney told the court he was instructed by the men that they were very intoxicated at the time but were now remorseful and ashamed. RSL state secretary Geoff Opray said the two men had committed a "despicable act". Mr Opray said Anzac Square in Brisbane's city centre was in the process of refurbishment and the RSL was considering installing security cameras.
"So throughout our great country, with pride our hearts turn
Our unknown soldier to us doth return
In the sunshine in Aussie, this day in November
Our Soldiers - our Heroes, we'll always remember!!!!"
Posted by:God Save The World

#9  Pappy - Lol - love the handcuffs bit but you were damned light on the details, lol!
Posted by: .com   2004-11-26 9:08:09 PM  

#8  I was drunk

1. After a rugby match against an RNZAF team, woke up at dawn, sprawled on the runway, clad only in a pair of shorts,

2. Woke up and found myself handcuffed to a bed on a female artist's houseboat on San Francisco Bay,

3. Fell asleep on a train in Hong Kong, woke up twenty miles into Red China. Four PLA soldiers at the station very quickly bundled me onto a train headed back.

I don't drink much anymore. I figured I've used up near all the luck given me.
Posted by: Pappy   2004-11-26 9:05:32 PM  

#7  DB - Hell, that was no lady, lol! I won't say precisely what she was, in deference to Sea's sensitivities, but your use of lady is proof you're a Southern Gentleman and that she was a Yankee Bitch - to employ a less colorful term. Getting thrown out seems to me a badge of honor you should wear proudly, heh.
Posted by: .com   2004-11-26 7:29:30 PM  

#6  1991 MIT bar in Cambridge, Massachusets. Some friends and I were having a great time with several pitures of beer and a lady, for some reason unknown to me to this day, called me an Ignorant Southern Bastard. I called her a Daughter of a Bitch and her boyfriend then got in to the act. Tables were turned over and beer flew. I wonder if I'm the only person to be thrown out of the MIT Bar.
Posted by: Deacon Blues   2004-11-26 7:22:33 PM  

#5  Lol, Cornîliës - I've been there, too. I woke up in the "wrong" city once. On a Tuesday about noon some 30 years ago I decided to build a complete set of hurricane glasses they gave away at a certain hotel bar / club. Stupid long story. That was in Dallas. I woke up in a Holiday Inn near the Alamo in San Antonio. Had to look at the phonebook under the Gideon's Bible to figure that out. I quit then and there.

To this day I still occasionally have dreams that I believe come from working the river walk in San Antonio that night. "Dancing" on wobbly tables, falling in the river, and tackling a busty laughing waitress are recurring themes.

There were 2 different airports in Dallas serving regular flights to SA - took me about an hour to work out which one I had used - and thus where my car would be. Still took me a few hours to find it.

I figure no one has a sufficient surplus of IQ points to surrender, lol!
Posted by: .com   2004-11-26 5:21:55 PM  

#4  Did not indulge in drinking to the status of being 'drunk' for the past 30 years. The reason is as follows:

At the age of ~20, I was a sponge. I was in a military hospital and someone smuggled in some wine and a bottle of gin. Whole room partied as if there was no tomorrow, I don't recall why, but I guess any reason was a good one.

Being a tad selfish, after 2 glasses of wine, I drank about half a bottle (1 liter bottle). I woke up next day, thinking that albeit a nice party, it ended quite uneventfully. That's what I thought.

Then my roommates made oblique comments about my behavior last night. It turned out that I decided to 'ravish' one nurse. To my credit is the fact that she was extremely, and I mean extremely, comely. After making her uniform look like going through dense overgrowth of thorny bushes, my less drunk friends restrained me and directed me to my bed, where I peacefully zonked out.

Needless to say that I did not remember any of it.
From that on, I decided that any close encounters with any comely female have to be with clear head, so I have something (hopefully nice) to remember.

I do drink since then, but in a carefull moderation.
Posted by: Cornîliës   2004-11-26 5:08:17 PM  

#3  I was drunk

Uni: Standing on the top of the campus mini-bus, adopting a 'surfer pose' whilst the driver was banging out some Blues Brothers tracks and we were whizzing at 40 mph through the back lanes to and from campus.

Uni: Also hanging onto the windscreen wipers of a VW bug whilst another friend tried to shake me off. (wait, I wasn't drunk that time).
Posted by: Tony (UK)   2004-11-26 11:44:26 AM  

#2  I was drunk

... in Cologne, Feb. 1987 during an anti-nuke rally in some part of its downtown. Some guy got in my face, recognizing me as the Ugly American I was. Responded by saying 'if you guys didn't lose so many wars, maybe we wouldn't be over here with our Pershing missiles'. Then his pals came over. Wasn't too worried as I still had my Chuck Norris going at the time, but a few cops waddled over and 'advised' me to move a few blocks away as they screened me from the Greenpeace ruffians.

"Know when to walk away,
know when to run..."
Posted by: Raj   2004-11-26 9:26:00 AM  

#1  I was drunk

Sums it up right there. O.K., Rantburgers, lets start a thread on all the stupic things we did while drunk and either overseas or in colledge, or both.

As for myself, I'm half convinced that I'm personaly responsible for half the anti-U.S. attitude in Korea. It seemed evry time I went out on pass, I wound up fighting evry Korean I ran into.
Posted by: N Guard   2004-11-26 8:47:10 AM  

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