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Down Under
'Boring' Mrs Blair forgets which country she's in
2005-02-08
"It's not? It's not Australia? I thought it was Australia. Don't you have kangaroos and such here?... New Zealand? Really? What do they have in New Zealand?... Kiwis? And sheep? And those fruits that look like great big hairy grapes?"
Cherie Blair opened her controversial Australasian speaking tour last night with a spectacular gaffe, forgetting which country she was in. Diners at the charity event in New Zealand listened in shock as she confused them with their arch-rivals in Australia. The Prime Minister's wife, despite charging a reported £125,000 for her six-date tour of the two countries, then made the same mistake again. "Calling us Australians was the worst faux pas you can imagine - and she did it twice," said a businessman after the speech. "I don't think she benefited herself with her presentation. And it was boring. I give her a two out of 10."
Cherie's brand of platitudinous, illogical and nonsensical PC mind-farting is feted by the UK's chattering Guardianista class. Count yourselves lucky you don't get to hear more of it.
British newspaper journalists were removed from the Auckland Convention Centre shortly before the half-hour speech began. [L]ater, after a dinner of prawns, rack of lamb and pistachio cheesecake, she struggled to live up to her superstar billing, according to members of the audience. "I thought Cherie was very poor," said Caroline Canning, 34, an insurance executive. "She flogged her book, and for a woman of her credentials she could have had a lot more weight and talked about her work with human rights. Instead it was all about who painted which walls in Downing Street - peripheral crap. Sharlene McDonald, 45, also an insurance executive, said: "I'd give her three out of 10. We were expecting nine out of 10." A local celebrity chef, Peta Mathias, said: "I was expecting something more intellectual. I had no idea she would be talking about the book." Mrs Blair, wearing a bright turquoise silk coat and dress, entered the conference hall alongside the prime minister, Helen Clark, to a standing ovation and the strains of a song called You Are Amazing.
An amazing liability, perhaps.
Ticket sales in Auckland and the proceeds of a charity auction have already raised nearly £180,000 from Mrs Blair's New Zealand visit, without counting commercial sponsorships. It has been reported that she will receive a third of proceeds, the same proportion as the charities.
Posted by:Bulldog

#11  Hmph. Mrs. Blair looked like she just sucked on a lemon or something...
Posted by: Bomb-a-rama   2005-02-08 9:52:54 PM  

#10  Ah, Perth. Another day in paradise. I envy you phil_b
Posted by: Mrs. Davis   2005-02-08 7:29:11 PM  

#9  ...after a dinner of prawns, rack of lamb and pistachio cheesecake...

...celebrity chef, Peta Mathias...

A celebrity chef named "Peta" making Prawns and Rack of Lamb... How Odd...
Posted by: BigEd   2005-02-08 6:57:56 PM  

#8  What a dumb cow - calling Kiwis Australians FFS!. Dumb and ugly.

C'mon phil_b! - you don't have to put up with the Socialist swine that are NuLabour! I don't think I can handle another 4 years of them...
Posted by: Tony (UK)   2005-02-08 6:30:36 PM  

#7  She is a typical underfed Moonbat. If she was anyone but Tony's wife she would be called a liberal skank.
Posted by: Sock Puppet of Doom   2005-02-08 4:29:52 PM  

#6  Maybe she'll get a gift of 12 ranbutan.
Posted by: Shipman   2005-02-08 4:03:54 PM  

#5  HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

That's rich.

Shoulda said "Helenistan", I guess.
Posted by: mojo   2005-02-08 10:35:57 AM  

#4  Human Rights Lawyer must be an undemanding profession.

Well, duh. Half the time you just ask for money so you can "fight American imperialism" and the other half you suck off the Saudi teat while defending jihadis in court.
Posted by: Robert Crawford   2005-02-08 8:58:46 AM  

#3  well at least I hope the pistachio cheescake was good.
Posted by: Jarhead   2005-02-08 7:36:27 AM  

#2  "I was expecting something more intellectual. She arrived in Perth, Western Australia where I live today. The sound bite at the airport portrayed her as a typical witless Pom. 'The weather is really nice here.' Like she had no idea it is always hot and it never rains in the summer here. Human Rights Lawyer must be an undemanding profession.

Otherwise I am hoping that all the Iraq war supporters get re-elected. It will be a historic rejection of the left's agitprop So far Aznar is the only exception due to the special circumstances of Madrid, but I really have to stretch things to hope Blair gets re-elected
Posted by: phil_b   2005-02-08 7:00:28 AM  

#1  Wait a minute. Mrs. Blair is allowed to accept £125,000 for speechifying while her husband is the UK Prime Minister? It seems to me she runs the risk of people paying her in order to influence her husband. Does she have plans to talk in Paris about her wonderful wall painter?
Posted by: ed   2005-02-08 6:36:38 AM  

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