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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Drunken Speeding Beaver With Homosexual Sheep Arrested
2005-03-17
A headline too good to pass up. "...And the dish ran away with the spoon."An Oregon State football had a stolen sheep in the bed of his pickup when he was pulled over for speeding last week, Benton County authorities said.Defensive tackle Ben Siegert, 20, was charged with driving under the influence of intoxicants after failing field sobriety tests. Ninety minutes after being pulled over, the 280-pound Siegert registered a .14 percent blood-alcohol content on a breath analyzer at the Benton County Jail, according to the sheriff's office. Oregon considers drivers with a .08 percent blood alcohol content to be drunk.

Siegert told the (Corvallis) Gazette-Times that he had nothing to do with the stolen ram. "I don't know anything about that," he said. "I'm from a city. I don't know anything about sheep." Benton County Undersheriff Diana Simpson disagreed, saying Siegert might have been "too intoxicated to remember." Also in the pickup were former Oregon State football player Brent Charles Bridges, 22, and Whitney Susan Rodgers, 19, of Glendale, Ariz. The 200-pound ram lives at the university's Sheep Center, and is part of a study on homosexuality in sheep, said Sheep Center manager Tom Nichols. "We have at least one prank a year where we have to go to a dormitory or a sorority house and pick up a ram or a lamb or a ewe," Nichols said. "It's one of those springtime pranks." The deputy chose not to arrest anybody for taking the sheep.
Posted by:Anonymoose

#6  A football was driving? Amazing!
Posted by: mojo   2005-03-17 2:53:27 PM  

#5  ...is part of a study on homosexuality in sheep...

Perhaps the drunken man heard the ram say, "Get me out of here! I'm not gay! Do you know what they wanted me to do?"

It could be part of an insanity defense at the trial....
Posted by: BigEd   2005-03-17 12:47:32 PM  

#4  Doc, that was just awful. LOL.

Lemme see, today we've got articles on the UN, the EU, and homosexual sheep: all part of a common theme.
Posted by: Matt   2005-03-17 12:03:08 PM  

#3  Honest officer, there will never be another ewe, I promise.

Posted by: Doc8404   2005-03-17 11:31:01 AM  

#2  Study on homosexuality in sheep. Say that to yourself out loud. Then, if you are a taxpayer in Oregon, get your pitchfork and march on the capital.
Posted by: Jonathan   2005-03-17 11:05:46 AM  

#1  I don't know anything about sheep

But I bet he was on his way to find out more...
Posted by: Desert Blondie   2005-03-17 10:55:01 AM  

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