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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Lion Mutilates 42 Midgets |
| 2005-05-16 |
| Spectators cheered as entire Cambodian Midget Fighting League squared off against African Lion. Tickets had been sold-out three weeks before the much anticipated fight, which took place in the city of Kâmpóng Chhn'ng. The fight was slated when an angry fan contested Yang Sihamoni, President of the CMFL, claiming that one lion could defeat his entire league of 42 fighters. Sihamoni takes great pride in the league he helped create, as was conveyed in his recent advertising campaign for the CMFL that stated his midgets will "... take on anything; man, beast, or machine." This campaign is believed to be what sparked the undisclosed fan to challenge the entire league to fight a lion; a challenge that Sihamoni readily accepted. An African Lion (Panthera Leo) was shipped to centrally located Kâmpóng Chhn'ng especially for the event, which took place last Saturday, April 30, 2005 in the city's coliseum. The Cambodian Government allowed the fight to take place, under the condition that they receive a 50% commission on each ticket sold, and that no cameras would be allowed in the arena. The fight was called in only 12 minutes, after which 28 fighters were declared dead, while the other 14 suffered severe injuries including broken bones and lost limbs, rendering them unable to fight back. Sihamoni was quoted before the fight stating that he felt since his fighters out-numbered the lion 42 to 1, that they "
could out-wit and out-muscle [it]." Unfortunately, he was wrong. |
| Posted by:Chuck Simmins |
| #17 So, who will run with this first? CBS or Newsweek? |
| Posted by: jackal 2005-05-16 22:46 |
| #16 Would anyone be surprised to find that Don King owns the PPV rights? |
| Posted by: Super Hose 2005-05-16 21:41 |
| #15 should've fought a Lion Of Islam™. Midgets would've skinned em |
| Posted by: Frank G 2005-05-16 19:03 |
| #14 Next, you're gonna tell me that the midgets were Christians. Is this story for real or did Isikoff write this one too? |
| Posted by: GK 2005-05-16 18:11 |
| #13 RWV: The NYT should have that feature, too. |
| Posted by: Anonymoose 2005-05-16 16:59 |
| #12 Phony? Gee, y'think? |
| Posted by: mojo 2005-05-16 16:12 |
| #11 If you go to the article, it appears to be a BBC story. However, if you click "printable version" you are sent to a disclaimer page where the prankster confesses he created the fake page to win a bet with a friend. |
| Posted by: RWV 2005-05-16 16:12 |
| #10 They apparently love midgets, but the repast was interrupted. Two questions: Did Sihamoni survive? What was the Govt "take"? I thought I'd heard / seen it all after running into the snake blood guys in Bangkok, see a bona-fide dog-pit match in Bosier City, the Toul Sleng Genocide museum's Skull map in Phnom Penh, and seeing the cobra routine in Bombay - Goa, actually. How naive of me. |
| Posted by: .com 2005-05-16 16:09 |
| #9 This was a good ha-ha from a week or two ago, but while they were at it, they should have used the BBC letterhead to better advantage with fake headlines like: "BBC Admits War In Iraq Was A Good War -- Issues Apology For Repeatedly Deceiving Public With Biased Reporting"; "BBC Poll: Bush Is Great President"; "EU Constitution An Elitist, Bureaucratic Sham"; "British Public Still Openly Despise French, Germans, Wogs, And With Good Reason". |
| Posted by: Anonymoose 2005-05-16 16:07 |
| #8 So where does PETA stand in all this? |
| Posted by: CrazyFool 2005-05-16 15:58 |
| #7 The err... meat of the story is that the Cambodian Midget Fighting League is pretty much out of business. I'm gonna miss them on pay-per-view. |
| Posted by: Chuck Simmins 2005-05-16 15:57 |
| #6 After reading this, I have to ask myself, am I having acid flashbacks? |
| Posted by: tu3031 2005-05-16 15:55 |
| #5 lol. Nice one though they didn't quite capture the tone of BBC writing style. |
| Posted by: Tkat 2005-05-16 15:53 |
| #4 Lion(s) - why |
| Posted by: Raj 2005-05-16 15:47 |
| #3 Sounds like a send up of some sort. |
| Posted by: Shipman 2005-05-16 15:47 |
| #2 Sounds like a historical reenactment of Pol Pot's boys against the Vietnamese to me. Festive ratflesh satay with dipping sauce or fruit salsa would be appropriate food for watching the fast paced and largely pathetic event. |
| Posted by: Iron Chef Kenichi 2005-05-16 15:46 |
| #1 I thought gladitorial games died out with the Romans. Guess I'm a little short of facts.... |
| Posted by: mmurray821 2005-05-16 15:16 |