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Caribbean-Latin America
CIA 'plot to kill Chavez'
2005-12-09
Venezuelan politicians claim that the CIA plotted to kill Hugo Chavez, the president, in an attempt to derail the country’s legislative elections on 4 December. President Chavez has often denounced what he called US-backed plans to assassinate him. American officials deny the claims as populist rhetoric meant to increase support at home, and the CIA has dismissed the latest accusation. Nicolas Maduro, a Chavez ally and president of the National Assembly, said that he planned to file charges with the attorney-general and military prosecutors "of a plot orchestrated by the CIA against the Venezuelan democracy". But Paul Gimigliano, a CIA spokesman, said: "It's nonsense."
Fergawdsake. Just go ahead and bump him off. We're tired of hearing him shriek about it every three weeks.
Posted by:Fred

#19  Mr. "Johnson" in External Contracts writes:

"Hey, Hugo! If we wanted you dead, you'd BE dead, you stupid bastard."
Posted by: mojo   2005-12-09 15:50  

#18  Why would the Culinary Institute of America want to kill Hugo?

(Don't laugh...you ever see how those guys handle a knife? He'd be filleted in no time!)
Posted by: Desert Blondie   2005-12-09 13:10  

#17  They were going to do a rendition but could not get the flight plan cleared. I vote we release those eco terrorist and tell them Chavez is dumping oil into the ocean and clear cutting the jungles for cattle.
Posted by: 49 pan   2005-12-09 13:04  

#16  You know, Hugo may be right that the CIA is tring to kill him. The best evidence for this is he is still alive and frothing. Not that I'm accusing the CIA of incompetent buffoonery or anything.
Posted by: SteveS   2005-12-09 12:12  

#15  Any chance the same bullet could mysteriously take out Mucky al-Sadr? Just hoping...
Posted by: Hyper   2005-12-09 11:38  

#14  And Putin mysteriously chokes on a Super Bowl ring...

*Snicker*
Posted by: Seafarious   2005-12-09 09:57  

#13  Maybe Bush is gonna wait until the last week of the administration in 2008. The he goes Michael Corleone and settles all family business. Sammy's found hung in his cell. Kimmie's train blows up. Ahmadinejad dies of a heroin overdose. Assad takes one in the eye. Fidel "dies in his sleep".
And Hugo buys it from a "stray round" from one of his own guys shooting in the air to celebrate another stirring speech.
The final scene? Howard Dean in the Oval Office kissing W's hand.
Posted by: tu3031   2005-12-09 09:30  

#12  Its not official till its leaked to the WaPo.
Posted by: Threarong Sholump2965   2005-12-09 08:59  

#11  No thanks, Raptor. We don't need another reliably Democratic state in the U.S.
Posted by: mac   2005-12-09 08:02  

#10  Can't get the link button to work.Here is the site:
http://www.guyanausa.org/
Posted by: raptor   2005-12-09 07:22  

#9  Boy,I sure scrwed that post.

...an American state on the Atlantic coast of Sth.America
Posted by: raptor   2005-12-09 07:21  

#8  Guyana,USA
Ran across this link the other day at http://anglosphere.com/weblog/.Cool idea,an American state on the Atlantic coast,next door to Hugo would sure put a twist in his panties.
Posted by: raptor   2005-12-09 07:15  

#7  This makes the 49th CIA plot to kill Hugo he has claimed, this week.

This clown inflates his importance to us to compensate for his 1 inch pecker.
Posted by: Mahou Sensei Negi-bozu   2005-12-09 06:16  

#6  The CIA? Lol, not our current CIA. Pat Robertson would prolly be more effective. Almost makes me wanna send a donation to the 700 Club - earmarked for putting PAID to Chavez. Wotta twerp.
Posted by: .com   2005-12-09 01:23  

#5  Did you happen to write down the tail numbers on that drone overhead?
Posted by: Seafarious   2005-12-09 00:49  

#4  Think how much you'll feel when that lightning bolt gets him :-)
Posted by: Steve White   2005-12-09 00:45  

#3  I dunno... the idea that he and his ilk are constantly looking over their shoulders gives me the warm-fuzzies.
Posted by: Pappy   2005-12-09 00:44  

#2  The CIA? How are they supposed to be planning on killing him - exploding cigars?

Like Fred says - just bump him off. No matter how or when he croaks the US will be blamed for it. If a lightning bolt comes out of the sky to strike his sorry lying dictator ass dead, we'll get blamed for it. Might as well live up to our press.
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2005-12-09 00:33  

#1  proving the ol' saying - just because you are paranoid doesn't mean that they aren't out to get you.
Posted by: 2b   2005-12-09 00:03  

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