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| China-Japan-Koreas |
| Panda Bites Drunken Man so Drunken Man Bites Panda |
| 2006-09-20 |
| BEIJING - A drunken Chinese migrant worker jumped into a panda enclosure at the Beijing Zoo, was bitten by the bear and retaliated by chomping down on the animal’s back, state media said Wednesday. Zhang Xinyan, from the central province of Henan, drank four jugs of beer at a restaurant near the zoo before visiting Gu Gu the panda on Tuesday, the Beijing Morning Post said. “He felt a sudden urge to touch the panda with his hand,” and jumped into the enclosure, the newspaper said. The panda, who was asleep, was startled and bit Zhang, 35, on the right leg, it said. Zhang got angry and kicked the panda, who then bit his other leg. A tussle ensued, the paper said. “I bit the fellow in the back,” Zhang was quoted as saying in the newspaper. “Its skin was quite thick.” Other tourists yelled for a zookeeper, who got the panda under control by spraying it with water, reports said. Zhang was hospitalized. Newspaper photographs showed Zhang lying on a hospital bed with blood-soaked bandages and a seam of stitches running down his leg. ‘No one ever said they would bite’ The Beijing Youth Daily quoted Zhang as saying that he had seen pandas on television and “they seemed to get along well with people.” “No one ever said they would bite people,” Zhang said. “I just wanted to touch it. I was so dizzy from the beer. I don’t remember much.” Ye Mingxia, a spokeswoman for the Beijing Zoo, confirmed the incident happened but would not give any details. She said Gu Gu was “healthy.” “We’re not considering punishing him now,” Ye said in a telephone interview. “He’s suffered quite a bit of shock.” |
| Posted by:mcsegeek1 |
| #4 A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer with a ham sandwich. A waiter brings the sandwich and the bartender pours the panda his beer. The bartender says, "We don't get too many pandas here." The panda says, "And at these prices you won't get many more." [rimshot] The panda harfs his sandwich in one bite and gulps down the beer in a single swallow. He gets up off of the stool and heads for the door. The waiter comes running up to the panda exclaiming, "But wait, you haven't paid for the sandwich and beer!" The panda draws and fires a 9mm straight through the waiter's heart. The bartender runs up and asks, "Why did you shoot the waiter, he wasn't going to hurt you?" The panda waves around the 9mm pistol and as the bartender backs off, the panda replies, "I'm a panda, look it up in the dictionary!" The bartender goes back to his office and looks up "panda" in the dictionary. pan - da (pan - dah) noun Ursine quadruped native to southeast Asia. Eats shoots and leaves. |
| Posted by: Zenster 2006-09-20 23:37 |
| #3 who doesn't like a freezer full of Panda venison?...mmmmm sweet n' sour jerky! |
| Posted by: Frank G 2006-09-20 23:26 |
| #2 Humans, why do they hate us? |
| Posted by: Abdominal Snowman 2006-09-20 23:21 |
| #1 Punishing who? |
| Posted by: john 2006-09-20 17:16 |