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India-Pakistan
Nuggets from the Urdu press
2007-05-12
Rose pedals shower dead lovers
As reported in daily Jang, a young boy, Waqas, who wanted to marry his sweetheart, took poison after a fight with his mother over the marriage proposal. The girl also took poison and reached the house of Waqas then started weeping over his dead body. She was rushed to the hospital when blood started from her mouth but she died on her way to the hospital. People showered rose petals on their janazas as they were lifted from the same street.

Fake pir beats the jinn out of a woman
As reported in daily Jang, in Gagu Mandi Munir AhmadÂ’s wife was running a high fever for few days. He took her to a local Pir Yasin Shah who said that she is under the control of very powerful jinn. He started treatment by beating her with hockey stick and the woman became unconscious. The pir charged Munir Ahmad 200 rupees fee and said the wife would be fine when she reached home. The woman died after remaining unconscious for two days.

Faisalabad madrassa follows Jamia Hafsa
As reported in daily Express, the students of Jamia Qasmia in Faisalabad raided an alleged brothel house, inspired by the incident of Jamia Hafsa. The residents of Ghulam Mohammad Abad registered their complaint with the madrassa against the woman who was running a brothel in the area. The students raided the locality and one student was arrested by the police.

Dacoits return jewellry to mehfil-e-milad women
As reported in daily Jang, in Daska four armed dacoits entered a house where women were holding mehfil-e-milad and snatched their jewellery at gun-point worth lacs of rupees. When the dacoits tried to stop the recitation of milad, the brave women refused to stop zikr-e-rasool (PTUI PBUH). Inspired by their faith the dacoits returned the jewellery and left after apologising to the women.

Madrassa teacher booked under WomenÂ’s Protection Bill
As reported in daily Jang, a naib nazim Safiullah, aka Janat Gul, of a madrassa in Kahna tricked a boy, Naveed, to his room and tried to sodomize him. He beat him violently when the boy struggled and ran away. The abuser reached the house of the boy with an accomplice, but the local residents intervened and nabbed the culprits. A force of 25 stick bearing madrassa students attacked the residents of the street and forcefully released the culprits before the arrival of police. Police registered the case in section 367/A under the Women Protection Bill.

Fatwa against suicide bombing
As reported in daily Nawa-e-Waqt, two thousand ulema in a convention organised by Jamiat ulema Islam gave a fatwa that suicide bombing and establishing shariat by force, is un-Islamic. The six page fatwa by the convention stated that threatening barbers to stop shaving beards and attacking CD shops is also against Islam. Some hidden forces are attacking the Islamic government and are killing their own Muslim brothers. They said that these acts are bringing a bad name to madrassas and ulema.

Marriage of egoists Abhishek and Aishwarya
Accoriding to daily Jang, the experts of numerology said that the handwriting of Abhishek Bachan and Aishwarya Rai indicated that they wouldn't rebel against the family traditions. Abhishek could be physically harmed in 2008 but that can be avoided via puja. They advised Aishwarya to change her name into Aishwarya Bachan, but if she kept her name even as Aishwarya Rai Bachan, her mother could influence her marriage. They might have internal conflicts as both are big stars and Aishwarya Rai is more an egoist than Abhishek, but the clash of egos would not lead to separation.

‘Imam Mehdi’ arrested by police
As reported in daily Nawa-e-Waqt, in the southern Punjab city of Ahmad Pur Sharqia a man was arrested for declaring himself as ‘Imam Mehdi.’ The jobless resident of Mohalla Nur Shah, Bilal Ahmad, was arrested under section 295 and 298 for blasphemy and sent to Bhawalpur central jail.

People accusing the cricket team should leave Pakistan
As reported in Daily Pakistan, popular all rounder Shahid Afridi of the Pakistan cricket team said that those who are hurling allegations of match fixing on Pakistan cricket team have no right to live in Pakistan. He said that he wanted to be the captain of Pakistan cricket team but he would support the new captain. He demanded that the PCB shall appoint a senior player as vice captain and ex-cricketers shall find new talent rather than finding jobs with the PCB.

12 year old Taliban slaughters his spy comrade
As reported in daily Express, Taliban commander Mullah Akhtar Usmani issued a video cassette showing the slaughter of his own comrade, Qari Ghulam Nabi, for spying against the Taliban. A 12 year old Taliban boy was shown with a knife slaughtering Qari Ghulam Nabi. The boy said that this would be the fate of all those who are spying for America. According to American news agency, Qari Ghulam Nabi was a Pakistani citizen whose father, Ghulam Sakhi, vowed to avenge the murder of his son.

Police officers released Sonia Naz case
As reported in daily Nawa-e-Waqt, an additional session judge released SP Khalid Abdullah and inspector Iqbal Chisti who were arrested in the famous Sonia Naz rape case. The court ruled that the applicant, Sonia Naz, was summoned by the court many times because she couldnÂ’t be contacted as she left her home for an undisclosed location.

Fight over the donations for shrine of Amir Cheema
As reported in Daily Pakistan, professor Mohammad Nazir Cheema, the father of Amir Cheema shaheed who sacrificed his life for the protection of sanctity of the Prophet Mohammad (PTUI PBUH) in Berlin, alleged that Pir Mohammad Afzal Qadri of Gujrat has purchased a land near the donated land of the grave of Amir Cheema and is receiving donations to construct a shrine. Pir Afzal Qadri has threatened to shift the remains of Amir Cheema to Gujrat.

Sarfraz NawazÂ’s mouth for rent
As reported in daily Jang, the ex-captain of Pakistan cricket team Imran Khan sent legal notice against Sarfraz Nawaz for his allegations and said that Sarfraz NawazÂ’s mouth is rented by people and is being used after the World Cup. He said SarfrazÂ’s allegations of betting on Javed Miandad, he and now the Pakistan cricket team has brought bad reputation for Pakistan in the international press.

Pope finds ambiguity in Darwin's theory
As reported in daily Nawa-e-Waqt, Pope Benedict 16th criticized DarwinÂ’s theory of evolution and said there are a lot of loop holes in this theory. He said there should be a compromise between reason and faith. He repeated the words of Pope John Paul II that DarwinÂ’s theory is still more than a hypothesis, but it is not yet complete.

Westernised women working for clash of civilisations
As reported in daily Jang, the ameer of Jamaat Islami, Qazi Hussain Ahmad, said that a few Westernised women are protesting against the religious extremists to please the Americans. These protests are creating discord among the MuslimsÂ’ unity. The Western embassies in Pakistan are funding these NGOs and Westernised women to create the atmosphere of a clash of civilisations in Pakistan.
Posted by:Fred

#8  kojo, I only wish my daily paper had such a diverse selection of stories. Where else can you find stories about field hockey medicine, cricket patriotism,apologetic jewellery thieves and a truculent pope?

read...

jinn,
poison,
best little whorehouse in Faisalabad™,
zikr-e-rasool (PTUI),
sodomize,
Fatwa who krapped a large shariat,
klash of EGOS,
section 295 and 298,
Pope Krickets,
12 year old Muslim Scout who Cuts Throats,
rape,
shrine,
Darwin's loop hole,
Wymins are creating discord among the MuslimsÂ’ unity!
Posted by: RD   2007-05-12 17:33  

#7   I only wish my daily paper had such a diverse selection of stories.

Go on your knees and thank your god that you were not born a Pakistani... else your daily paper would have such a selection of stories.
Posted by: John Frum   2007-05-12 12:33  

#6  They don't call it PakiWakistan for nothing. Those people are whacky as all get out.
Posted by: Elmereter Hupash6222   2007-05-12 11:15  

#5  What a bunch of loop holes
Posted by: KBK   2007-05-12 10:30  

#4  I only wish my daily paper had such a diverse selection of stories. Where else can you find stories about field hockey medicine, cricket patriotism,apologetic jewellery thieves and a truculent pope?
Posted by: Kojo Ebbereger8078   2007-05-12 08:33  

#3  Unfortunately (thanks to China) they already got the bomb
Posted by: John Frum   2007-05-12 06:46  

#2  Lord sometimes I think the bomb would be a mercy upon them.
Posted by: Shipman   2007-05-12 04:43  

#1  Okay FredMan it kinda obvious you're just cranking this stuff out.

To wit:

He started treatment by beating her with hockey stick and the woman became unconscious. The pir charged Munir Ahmad 200 rupees

That didn't happen. I reject it.
Posted by: Shipman   2007-05-12 04:40  

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