A family on the Upper West Side of New York has placed an ad in New York magazine pleading for $1 million to buy an apartment so they can stay in their wealthy neighborhood. Gawker spotted the ad and posted it here; it reads: "WE NEED HELP BUYING AN APARTMENT on the UWS, 3bd 2 bath. YOU are a philanthropic, wealthy person who would not miss a million bucks and would be interested in donating (or even investing) in a highly targeted manner: to my family. WE are a wonderful, hard working middle class family who contributes to our UWS community, is entrenched, happy and desperately wants to remain on the UWS (lest the city lose yet another wonderful family to the burbs). We can afford 600-700K, so you see the predicament. Can you help us??"
We're not going to reprint their email address (Gawker has it), because we don't want any of you millionaires being tempted to help these horrid people. As charities that serve, I don't know, POOR PEOPLE, make their holiday pleas for donations, this rich family has the GALL to imply that they with their 700K budget are needy. We WISH we had their problems.
Oh wait, we DO. That's why we live in a teensy apartment in Brooklyn, where our 100-square-foot home office is also our son's nursery. And still, we're donating to actual charities this year, like the Red Cross. We also ran a list here on Babble's holiday gift guide of some smaller, family-friendly do-gooding organizations, like Modest Needs, where you can help a genuinely struggling family with an unexpectedly high electric bill or transportation to work.
Are you donating to charities this year? What are your favorite ones? Please don't say the Upper West Side Whiners Society.
I would like to help these downtrodden peasants, but a million would force me to leave my Gulfstream on the tarmac and take a low-class Learjet to the next climate conference in Acapulco.