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-Short Attention Span Theater- |
PETA Urges Ben & Jerry's To Use Breast Milk |
2008-09-24 |
Those two freaks must be agonizing over this. Called on it by PETA. Those bastards! WATERBURY, Vt. -- People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, cofounders of Ben & Jerry's Homemade Inc., urging them to replace cow's milk they use in their ice cream products with human breast milk, according to a statement recently released by a PETA spokeswoman. Titty Vanilly? Boobalicious? Sweater Monkey Crunch? "PETA's request comes in the wake of news reports that a Swiss restaurant owner will begin purchasing breast milk from nursing mothers and substituting breast milk for 75 percent of the cow's milk in the food he serves," the statement says. Puts a new spin on "milking time"... PETA officials say a move to human breast milk would lessen the suffering of dairy cows and their babies on factory farms and benefit human health. Ummmmmmmmm...they're dairy cows. It's what they're for. Are we gonna set them loose in the wild? "The fact that human adults consume huge quantities of dairy products made from milk that was meant for a baby cow just doesn't make sense," says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. "Everyone knows that 'the breast is best,' so Ben & Jerry's could do consumers and cows a big favor by making the switch to breast milk." ...and we haven't come up with anything outlandish in a coupla weeks. "We applaud PETA's novel approach to bringing attention to an issue, but we believe a mother's milk is best used for her child," said a spokesperson for Ben and Jerry's. ...and we would prefer not to piss our company down the drain so that we can remain rich old hippies. |
Posted by:tu3031 |
#17 BTW - I wasn't calling AS a butthead - it was a reference to the Mike Judge created cartoon from the 90s. |
Posted by: Flitch the Imposter aka Broadhead6 2008-09-24 23:02 |
#16 "They don't really want to uplift animals..." haha...you said "uplift..." -Butthead |
Posted by: Flitch the Imposter aka Broadhead6 2008-09-24 23:01 |
#15 Yall are milking this one for all it's worth. |
Posted by: Deacon Blues 2008-09-24 18:58 |
#14 I heard Pam Anderson was to be the donor but silicone levels exceeded federal safety standards. |
Posted by: ed 2008-09-24 17:12 |
#13 However came up with this is a complete tit! |
Posted by: Bright Pebbles 2008-09-24 17:08 |
#12 What boob came up with this idea? |
Posted by: SteveS 2008-09-24 15:28 |
#11 I think that a business initiative, it would be a bust. |
Posted by: JohnQC 2008-09-24 15:00 |
#10 There really ought to be a separate category for Red on Red conflicts be they Islamist vs Islamist, hippies vs. vegans, Kos kids vs Hillary or Alien vs Predator. |
Posted by: mhw 2008-09-24 14:43 |
#9 Ick. Posted by trailing wife I'd say that about covers it. |
Posted by: DLR 2008-09-24 13:58 |
#8 Behold the left. They don't really want to uplift animals, they just want to turn humans into cows. |
Posted by: Abdominal Snowman 2008-09-24 13:56 |
#7 Has FDA got any openings for inspectors? |
Posted by: Nimble Spemble 2008-09-24 13:56 |
#6 I'd like to check out the dipensers. |
Posted by: BrerRabbit 2008-09-24 13:44 |
#5 Ick. |
Posted by: trailing wife 2008-09-24 13:31 |
#4 Nipple Ripple and Mammaraschino Cherry |
Posted by: Beavis 2008-09-24 13:24 |
#3 Ben and Jerry do not own Ben and Jerry anymore. Unilever owns it now. Did you know that Ben & Jerry's has a Chief Euphoria Officer? So, I do not think human breast milk meets the standards of euphoria except for 6 month old little boys. |
Posted by: Jack is Back! 2008-09-24 13:05 |
#2 What about AIDS and Hepatitis and other nasties that breast milk can carry. |
Posted by: 3dc 2008-09-24 12:58 |
#1 They've totally lost it. |
Posted by: bigjim-ky 2008-09-24 11:57 |