#7 Why buy a separate copy of Newsweak when everything in it is an exact copy of what you would find in Time? Theres room for one Democrat party organ periodical, but not two. If they want to make money, then they should consider making something different from everyone else. Dare I suggest that they emulate Foxnews and give people an alternate voice from what everyone else is saying. If they did, you could justify buying one over the other. I know its crazy, but you could (dare I say it) compete with one another in the marketplace of ideas...
Naaaaaaaahhhh.
That said, does anyone actually buy magazines anymore? Specifically why would anyone buy a news magazine for news thats already a week old by the time you get it? And on top of that, why would anyone buy a news magazine when you already know what the writers are going to say before they say it. Ive been doing a bit of "signals analysis" on the writers at Newsweak and Time. For some time now, Ive been convinced that the "writers" are not actual writers, as in "people who write" they are actors who portray writers. Their written content is output that comes from a computer program that was commissioned by the Democrat party. You feed it a subject and it regurgitates the platitudes, half baked ideas and the utopian bongwater that forms the core of the logic of the left. Take any subject matter and you can almost see the flowchart that leads you through decision point and logic arrows but always puts you in:
"It Was Reagan screwed it all up",
"Right Wing America Threatens All Life On Earth"
"The only thing stopping the ERA from finally becoming law is that man down the street with the gas guzzling Hummmer"
"Bush was standing on the oxygen hose of wounded Lady Liberty when he lied to us about Iraq (and he was drunk too)"
The program assures that there are no "incidents" such as happened in the past where an actual writer would notice that their long held leftist arguments didn't actually hold up under scrutiny and would then step outside the party line and say something like "welfare is bad and it needs reform". The other added benefit of the "generator" is that anyone can be a "Writer". How else do you explain the celebrity content at the Huffpo? You don't think the half wit Hollywood actors actually wrote that stuff do you? They might believe it, but they believe just about anything, except the idea that "America is a good thing".
That of course, is where they draw the line.
The reason why the "generator" is necessary is that this sort of "Free Thinking" cannot be allowed under any circumstances, lest the "lumpen proletariat" start to get the idea that they can actually think for themselves and decide whats right and wrong without proper guidance from party central.
Howard Fineman? He's Chet Handley, summer stock player from Chautauqua. Got his start in "the Front Page" and really liked the role of "Big Time Writer". I dont think Chet is even aware what the "generator" program has written under his characters byline. Eleanor Clift? come on, the central casting office worked overtime on that one. They found that actress working the swing shift at Krispy Kreme in Moline Alabama. You have to admit,its a great role, the mad shrieking harpy. Not since George Costanza's mother has an actress been able to get away with that kind of mindless shrieking on the stage. ( I think Elsa Lanchester would've been better, but she was not available.)
You don't really think that she believes the stuff she says, do you? |
[Iran Press TV Latest] The Washington Post has announced it is exploring the possible sale of its highbrow magazine Newsweek as the weekly continues to suffer big losses.