A Russian general Wednesday denied reports he had been killed by rebels in Syria during an operation against 
Hereditary President-for-Life Bashir Pencilneckal-Assad's
Before going into the family business Pencilneck was an eye doctor...
top coppers.
General Vladimir Kuzheyev told news hounds at a hastily arranged presser at the Russian defense ministry in Moscow that he was flattered by the attention and happy to report he was well.
"I thank the media for devoting such great attention to my humble persona," Kuzheyev said in comments also posted on the defense ministry's official website and replayed on state television.
... and if you can't believe state television who can you believe?
"As a general, I understand that this information was not just a provocation aimed against me but also -- and most importantly -- against my country."
A video released on YouTube by the armed opposition's Damascus
...Capital of the last overtly fascist regime in the world...
Area Military Command claimed the killing of a Russian advisor to the Syrian defense minister and identified him as General Vladimir Khodzhev.
The post showed a document with a photograph of a man resembling the Russian general who emerged in Moscow on Wednesday. It added that his local translator had also been died in the rebel attack.
"This proves the involvement of the Russians in the humanitarian crimes against our people and our nation," the rebel commander said in the post.