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| Top Ten Excuses for the Obamacare Website Crash |
| 2013-10-26 |
| In private, senior White House officials are bitterly complaining about the reasons for the Obamacare website fiasco, offering up excuse after excuse for its failure. We share with you now the top ten excuses they are making for what seems to be an otherwise inexplicable catastrophe. ******* 10. “B Team” claimed to be the “A Team.” 9. Biden insisted on doing some of the coding himself. 8. Programmers spent too much time making out in the snack room with geek-adoring HHS staffers. 7. Complacent Obama aides figured, Hey, this is a U.S. government project. Of course it’s going to work! 6. While working, programmers sang, “The knee bone’s connected to the thigh bone, the thigh bone’s connected to the hip bone, the hip bone’s connected to the back bone,” but in web design, it’s the other way around. 5. Website built by “extremists,” “suicide bombers,” “kidnappers,” and “arsonists.” 4. Programmer dropped a piece of his Ring Ding in the software, screwing up everything. 3. Should have used orangutans to perform quality control instead of chimpanzees. 2. Dog ate my website. And the top excuse for the Obama website crash is . . . 1. You just can’t get a decent website for $394 million these days. |
| Posted by:Uncle Phester |
| #10 The website was done by a fully American subsidiary of CGI...maybe the mistake was getting Americans to do it. Rather like Americans subsidizing Canada's national defense. Sarcasm aside, perhaps it was because the website wasn't designed and built for the intended user? |
| Posted by: Pappy 2013-10-26 18:19 |
| #9 "Just blame it on Mossad." Isn't everything y'all's fault, grom? ;-p |
| Posted by: Barbara 2013-10-26 16:34 |
| #8 Just blame it on Mossad. |
| Posted by: g(r)omgoru 2013-10-26 14:46 |
| #7 The website was done by a fully American subsidiary of CGI...maybe the mistake was getting Americans to do it. I am sure, like Obama, CGI will get to the bottom of the problem. |
| Posted by: badanov 2013-10-26 14:27 |
| #6 Because Al Gore created the internet, mere humans are unable to comprehend the technology. |
| Posted by: swksvolFF 2013-10-26 14:18 |
| #5 clever, little troll. Dance Monkey! |
| Posted by: Frank G 2013-10-26 14:13 |
| #4 "The rollout of Obamacare had to be absolutely perfect. Obama needed to treat it like a 21st-century Manhattan Project... Instead, he took the pedestrian route and spent $400 million on a Canadian company that our Good Neighbors to the North once fired for incompetence." The website was done by a fully American subsidiary of CGI...maybe the mistake was getting Americans to do it. |
| Posted by: Jerkface Killa 2013-10-26 13:55 |
| #3 My favorite is #9. |
| Posted by: frozen Al 2013-10-26 13:46 |
| #2 James Taranto: Count Bloomberg's Margaret Carlson among the ObamaCare supporters who are unhappy, even angry, with the HealthCare.gov debacle: "The rollout of Obamacare had to be absolutely perfect. Obama needed to treat it like a 21st-century Manhattan Project... Instead, he took the pedestrian route and spent $400 million on a Canadian company that our Good Neighbors to the North once fired for incompetence." Carlson is being unfair here. ObamaCare is actually just like the Manhattan Project, a government program that produced an awesomely destructive bomb. |
| Posted by: Pappy 2013-10-26 11:52 |
| #1 "It is Bush's fault and the Republicans" was missing. Of course, "It is Fox News fault" is also missing. |
| Posted by: JohnQC 2013-10-26 11:17 |