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-Signs, Portents, and the Weather-
'Ottomans Were the First to Reach The Moon,' Sez Turkish President
2017-07-26
Something to make you smile for the day.
Istanbul| Ottomans were the first to walk on the surface of the moon, not Neil Armstrong, said Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan, yesterday, during an iftar (fast-breaking) dinner hosted by the Turkish Green Crescent.

Mr. Erdogan claimed that Muslim explorers reached the Moon more than 300 years before the beginning of the Appolo program, vowing to build a mosque "in the crater" where they landed.

"It is alleged that the first man to walk on the moon was Neil Armstrong in 1969," Erdogan said. "In fact, Muslim space explorers reached our satellite 334 years before that, in 1635. Everyone knows the story of the famous aviator, Lagâri Hasan Celebi, the "Ottoman Rocket Man", who made the first successful manned rocket flight in 1633. What you might not know, is that he attempted to reach the moon, two years later, and could very well have succeeded!"

The story of Lagari Hasan Celebi was purported by a famous 17th century Arab merchant and traveller, Mehmed Zilli, also known as Evliya Celebi. In his famous travelog, he explains that Lagari Hasan Celebi launched in a 7-winged rocket using 50 okka (63.5 kg or 140 lbs) of gunpowder. It took off from Sarayburnu, a site below the Topkapi Palace in Istanbul.

As Evliya Celebi wrote, Lagari proclaimed before launch "O my sultan! Be blessed, I am going to talk to Jesus!", before lighting the rocket’s gunpowder. He then ascended more than 200 meters in the air and landed in the sea, hundreds of meters from his takeoff point. Swimming ashore, he allegedly reported: "O my sultan! Jesus sends his regards to you!".

President Erdogan’s surprising claim generated some whispers and laughter from the audience, a reaction that clearly angered the Turkish politician. He slammed the skeptics for mocking his claims, adding that he would soon have the proofs to back his claims.

"Why do you not believe it? Because you’ve never believed that a Muslim can do such a thing, just like you’ve never believed that our ancestors could manage to launch ships in the Golden Horn after transporting them across land," Erdogan said, referring to Ottoman Sultan Mehmet II’s conquest of Istanbul in 1453. "This claim is not new. A number of academics in Turkey and in the rest of the world have made this claim, and I believe they are right. NASA may have destroyed most of the physical evidence of the Ottoman’s success during the Apollo 11 mission, but we’ll try to find any evidence that might have escaped the cover up."

The Turkish President did not, however, give any precision about the proofs he was expecting to find nor how he was hoping to gather them.

The story of Lagâri Hasan Celebi is considered a legend by most historians, and most experts believe that it is impossible that the "aviator" could have survived a flight into outer space.

His first flight was, indeed, addressed in an experiment by the television show MythBusters, on November 11, 2009, in the episode "Crash and Burn". The rocket constructed for the TV show did not adhere closely, however, to Evliya Celebi’s descriptions and the final design did not attempt to utilize materials of the period;

The team noted that Evliya Celebi had not sufficiently specified the alleged design used by Lagâri Hasan, but concluded that it would have been "extremely difficult" for a 17th-century figure, without access to modern steel alloys and welding techniques, to land safely or even achieve thrust at all. This conclusion was backed by the fact that, although the re-imagined rocket rose, it exploded in midflight


Posted by:3dc

#11  I thought the Profit Mo visited it in a drug induced 'vision' just after he visited Jerusalem in the same state...
Posted by: CrazyFool   2017-07-26 23:46  

#10  Kim Jong-un is disputing this report. He claims he time traveled to a year before the Turkish landing and sung the North Korean Anthem. He is not saying how he got back...
Posted by: BigEdLB   2017-07-26 22:01  

#9  I wonder if any members of the American Psychoanalytic Association have anything to say about this.
Posted by: Angie Schultz   2017-07-26 18:30  

#8  He then ascended more than 200 meters in the air and landed in the sea, hundreds of meters from his takeoff point.

Like an Islamic Kim Jong Pudge. If I didn't know they were too busy trying to destabilize America, I'd suspect the CIA was slipping LSD into Erdy's mint tea. Hey, maybe it's the ghost of Wild Bill Donovan!
Posted by: SteveS   2017-07-26 17:09  

#7  I think the Chinese beat them to it in rocketry by 300 years.
Posted by: Pappy   2017-07-26 16:18  

#6  
Posted by: Skidmark   2017-07-26 16:12  

#5  Ottomans can FOAD and become extinct too. Let them be the first to go extinct for outright moronic stupidity and their galaxy sized inferiority complex rooted in far too much truth.
Posted by: Silentbrick   2017-07-26 16:11  

#4  "... it exploded in midflight."

And that's when he talked to Jesus.
Posted by: Vast Right Wing Conspiracy   2017-07-26 15:42  

#3  
Posted by: Vast Right Wing Conspiracy   2017-07-26 15:40  

#2  How fragile are their egos and religion?
Posted by: DarthVader   2017-07-26 14:58  

#1  Mooselimbs have to be the first at everything and everywhere.

And build a Mosque.

Even if it is faker than a 6 dollar bill.
Posted by: DarthVader   2017-07-26 14:57  

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