[Babylon Bee] PORTLAND, OR‐A member of Antifa, Dustin Day, injured himself over the weekend while attempting to punch a nazi he spotted."So I had my mask on and was ready to fight any nazis that came to Portland -- because I guess the city is full of them -- and then I saw one," explained Day. "You could tell from just one look at the guy that he was a crazed sociopath looking for any excuse to get violent." That’s when Day said he ran up and attempted to punch the nazi, but instead his fist hit some sort of "invisible shield." He then screamed, "Advanced nazi technology!" and ran away.
Further investigation of where Day says he encountered the nazi revealed only a broken mirror hanging on the wall.
This all comes on the heels of three Antifa members looking down into a lake, saying they saw three nazis in the water, and promptly drowning in the confrontation.