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Home Front: Politix
Biden: 'Your Mother Was A Hamster, And Your Father Smelt Of Elderberries'
2020-02-14
[Babylon Bee] HAMPTON, NH‐Joe Biden fired back at a supporter criticizing his performance in the Iowa caucuses. She questioned why she should support him when he didn't even finish in the top three in Iowa.

Biden's response was baffling: "I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed, animal food trough-wiper."

The supporter was confused: "I'm sorry, what?"

"I fart in your general direction," he continued. "Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!"

"Are... are you just quoting Monty Python?" she asked, clearly baffled.

"You dirt-eating piece of slime! You scum-sucking pig! You son of a motherless goat!"

"That's not even the same franchise!" she shouted back.

Biden wasn't fazed, though, telling her to "go away or I will taunt you a second time." His poll numbers have gone up since the exchange as he's now quoting movies made within the last fifty years.
Posted by:Besoeker

#3  Get out a dollar bill. Grasp firmly on the narrow ends. "What was the last sound Stevie Ray Vaughn (Kobe, John Heinz, whoever) heard?" Pop the bill repeatedly.
Posted by: M. Murcek   2020-02-14 10:13  

#2  I fart in your general direction!
Posted by: Raj   2020-02-14 08:36  

#1  Just warming up, folks. Wait for him to do JACK TORRANCE:

"You were the caretaker, Mr. Grady."

"Words of wisdom, Lloyd. Words of wisdom!"

Wendy... when you hear this sound - chk, chk chk - it means ...."
Posted by: Lex   2020-02-14 02:20  

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