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Home Front: Politix

Trump Appoints Angry Honey Badger As New Press Secretary

2020-05-16

[Babylon Bee] President Trump revealed his new pick for press secretary to a horrified room of reporters Friday: an angry honey badger.

The aggravated little guy will take questions from the press and then leap out from the podium and maul their faces off.

"Is the President racist for calling the coronavirus the Chin---AHHHHHHH!!!" screamed one reporter as the badger cut him off by pouncing onto his head. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Make it stop!"

Another reporter in a fedora then slowly lowered his hand, withdrawing the question he was going to ask.

While members of the press are frightened of the new press secretary, they do say they anticipate less vicious responses than those of former press secretary Kayleigh McEnany. "Now she scared the daylights out of me," said Jim Acosta. "I'll take the honey badger."

On the badger's off days he will be replaced by a swarm of murder hornets.

Posted by:Frank G

#12 I wouldn't argue with her over the check.

Posted by: SteveS 2020-05-16 20:03

#11 I'm sure Kayleigh would be a fun date as long as she agreed not to kill you for pissing her off.

Posted by: M. Murcek 2020-05-16 18:49

#10 "Trump Appoints Angry Honey Badger As New Press Secretary"

GOOD! That's what the WH "press" corpse [;)] deserves, good and hard.

Posted by: Barbara 2020-05-16 16:54

#9 No goobers on the target. Go for the eyes it is.

Posted by: Whiskey Mike 2020-05-16 15:50

#8 "The aggravated little guy will take questions from the press and then leap out from the podium and maul their faces off."

Ummm... I think honey badgers go for the goobers, not for the face.

Just sayin'...

Posted by: Dave D. 2020-05-16 15:08

#7 I knew it was the Bee when they asked honey badger to stop. We all know the honey badger don't give a F$@#.

Posted by: bbrewer126 2020-05-16 12:37

#6 Yeah, Glenmore, bring on the Rattel.

Posted by: ed in texas 2020-05-16 12:07

#5 Off to a good start fir shurrr.

Posted by: swksvolFF 2020-05-16 09:56

#4 O.K. Bee, I'm one up today. Being a Honey Badger is a press secretary job requirement to rein in the fake-news Dem press. Kayleigh's doing a great job as a spox.

Posted by: JohnQC 2020-05-16 09:23

#3 Honey Badger, a pretty good nickname for Kayleigh.

Posted by: Phusotle Dingle5823 2020-05-16 08:30

#2 Reminds me of some great Lawdog tales.

Posted by: Glenmore 2020-05-16 07:46

#1 I knew that it was the Bee, cu, Kayleigh McEnany seems to be handling the press quite well.

Posted by: Rambler in Virginia 2020-05-16 00:24

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