[Babylon Bee] LOS ANGELES, CA‐In another controversial shooting, Andres Ryan was shot by police after allegedly robbing a convenience store. Ryan was completely unarmed -- give or take one firearm.The police tried to justify the shooting, saying they felt threatened by Ryan, despite his having only one gun more than completely harmless and the police having many more guns. The shooting immediately led to protests, though, as he was yet another person shot by police who only had zero-to-one guns.
"We have no choice but to try to loot a Target," said an Antifa member who wished to remain unnamed. "I can't think of any other way to approach something like this."
Many politicians have condemned the police, saying they need to show more restraint when nearly not being shot at. Presidential candidate Joe Biden has traveled to visit the injured Ryan personally, a visit during which Ryan mugged him.