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Biden Polling Well Among Pentecostals After He Speaks In Tongues |
2020-11-03 |
![]() "Man -- I was leaning toward Trump," said local Assemblies of God pastor Chet Whipperton. "But Biden really brought the fire today. I haven't seen an outpouring like that since Trump tweeted the mysterious angelic phrase 'covfefe.' I haven't decided for sure, but Biden is looking pretty good after today." Pentecostal scholars have asked for someone with the spiritual gift of interpretation to step forward and translate the mysterious phrase "trunalimunumaprzure" so the world may understand Biden's mysterious utterances. "This may be the key to the election!" said Whipperton. After a nationwide search, an interpreter named Bo Bittington was found in Kentucky. "Trunalimunumaprzure? That's easy, man," said Bittington. "It means Trump's gonna win." Experts in the Biden camp consulted their own spiritual interpreters, who confirmed that the phrase means Biden will win. Both camps are looking forward to finding out who was right when all the votes are counted in 8 months. |
Posted by:Whusosh Slomble1535 |
#4 Final paragraph of the article: Both camps are looking forward to finding out who was right when all the votes are counted in 8 months. I believe that comedian David Deeble is one of their writers. |
Posted by: trailing wife 2020-11-03 16:45 |
#3 Columnist Art Buchwald was a treasure. My favorite was his article about how the US Department of Agriculture was our real Spy Agency ("Nobody suspects them!"). Supposedly this triggered the Russians into sending out embassy staffers to check all those many Agricultural stations scattered everywhere. |
Posted by: magpie 2020-11-03 13:06 |
#2 The Babylon Bee is a treasure. Nothing has been this funny since MAD magazine 50 years ago. |
Posted by: Tom 2020-11-03 08:29 |
#1 I hereby acknowledge a Grand Master of Sarcasm Well Played, Well Played. |
Posted by: NN2N1 2020-11-03 05:09 |