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-Great Cultural Revolution
Democrat lawmaker proposes bill forcing Chicago grocery stores, gas stations to hire armed guards
2023-02-27
Posted by:Skidmark

#7  Automated stores will take over.

Back to the Sears catalog store, online.
Posted by: Skidmark   2023-02-27 23:35  

#6  Don’t they have to lift the gun control laws before the armed guard law can take place or is the Dollar General going to be forced to hire Brinks guys. The bill sponsor will likely have received donations from Brinks or some other firm.
Posted by: Super Hose   2023-02-27 22:22  

#5  Automated stores will take over. No employees or cash registers to rob. To get in will require credit/debit/EBT card and face scan and total surveillance while in the store. Select items with smart phone or touch display, pay with card and goods will appear on conveyor belt.

Slightly less dangerous areas will allow customers to place items tinto cart. Try to run out with goods and card will be charged.
Posted by: Ebbains Threrenter5475   2023-02-27 22:12  

#4  Naturally, they won't be allowed to shoot the criminals though. Ie, it's just another way for the politicians to soak up money from people. There will only be 'approved' companies you can use who are their friends and relatives.
Posted by: Silentbrick   2023-02-27 21:55  

#3  ... and there you have it. No need for a Sorting Hat, we all know what tribe to which we belong.
Posted by: Rex Mundi   2023-02-27 18:03  

#2  Gee. Just make every purchase a three-day waiting period like guns. Fill out your paperwork and pay and come back in three days to pick up your approved purchase.

Who could object to that? I mean, we're told all the time by the media that it's just "common sense."
Posted by: M. Murcek   2023-02-27 12:48  

#1  Desperate NYC merchants turn to K-9 units to sniff out shoplifters
Posted by: Skidmark   2023-02-27 12:32  

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