How now, brown cow?
Oh, bebby! Don't stop!
[NYPOST] A British man snuck into a farm in the middle of the night and had sex with a cow – but was discovered when he triggered an alarm placed by the animal’s wary owner, the Mirror reported.Ew! Ew1 Ew! Do ou know what it smells like back there?
A DNA sample proved Liam Brown, 25, had intercourse with the animal in Burton, near ​Dorset, on June 12, 2022, according to the outlet.
"Go ahead, Jones! Take the sample!"
"No! You take the sample!"
On Aug. 25, the sicko sobbed at Poole Magistrates Court when he pleaded guilty to sexual penetration with a living animal and causing unnecessary suffering to a protected animal.
"Stop it! I'm sufferinng here!"
"Shuddup, y' dumb cow!"
“The defendant was found by members of the farming family who had concerns regarding the welfare of the young livestock in question and set up alarms in the area,” prosecutor Charles Nightingale said.
"You there! Cease and desist that... what yer doin'!"
“On the night in question they were alerted by alarms and equipment they had set up with the result that the defendant was found,” he said. “Subsequently, samples were taken from the animal confirming the intercourse in question.”
"I hope yer prepared to do the right thing by our Bossy!""
Brown had been known to the farmers since he was a child because some of his relatives had been employed there, according to the report.
"Right! He used to do chicken!"
Bown was released on bail pending sentencing Sept. 22 at a crown court.
"Youse'll never take me alive, coppers!"
"Shuddup. Yer already in stir!
“It is going to crown court because the offenses are so serious it is possible you need greater punishment than we can give,” the judge told Brown as he sought to steer him straight.
"Okay! Okay! I'll marry her!"
