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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Live 2-foot eel chews through man's intestines after he put it up his anus
2024-08-03
Kids! Don't try this at home!
[NYPOST] Vietnamese doctors removed a live 2-foot-long eel from a man’s abdomen — that had chewed through his intestines after he shoved it up his anus.

The nauseating discovery was made when a 31-year-old Indian national was admitted to Viet Duc Hospital in Hanoi on July 27 with excruciating abdominal pain, according to Vietnam News.

Doctors learned that the adventurous patient had slipped the phallic fish up his backside earlier in the day — and it tried to escape.

“The eel had bitten through the patient’s rectum and colon to escape into the abdominal cavity,” said Le Nhat Huy, vice director of the Department of Colorectal and Perineal Surgery.

The patient was immediately examined and underwent several imaging tests, including an X-ray that showed the eel’s skeleton lying inside his abdominal cavity.

Doctors attempted to remove the foreign object through the man’s anus — but they discovered a large lime that he had also inserted blocking the way.
OK, I get the eel, but the lime just makes it kinda weird
Would you want to have to worry about an angry eel exiting that close to your precious male bits?
Instead, doctors opted for an emergency surgery.

They sliced open the the patient’s torso and found the live eel, stretching more than 25 inches long and roughly 4 inches in diameter.

The creature and the lime were both removed.

After checking for any additional foreign objects hiding inside the man, they stitched him up. Surgeons also performed a colostomy to prevent fecal matter from passing through the cut made by the eel’s bite.

Doctors at the hospital told Vietnam News that they’ve dealt with patients, typically young men, who have put objects up their bums for sexual pleasure.

Viet Duc Hospital has previously removed bottles, cups
Cups?!?!! The things I absolutely do not want to understand…
and adult toys from patients’ anuses— but this is the first case involving a live animal.

“Eels can survive in anaerobic conditions for a long time and have the ability to bite through the gastrointestinal tract,” Huy warned.

“Therefore, people should never insert live animals through the anus to seek intense sensations due to the unforeseeable consequences.”

This, however, was not the first time an eel was removed from someone’s backside in Vietnam this year.

In March, a 12-inch eel slid up a 43-year-old man’s anus. He was rushed to the Hai Ha District Medical Center in Quang Ninh Province, where the sea creature was removed.

Posted by:Fred

#10  It's not every day you feel a poignant pang of sympathy for an eel. Been a while for me, anyway.
Posted by: Pancho Poodle8452   2024-08-03 23:39  

#9  What? No gerbils?
Posted by: Cheaderhead   2024-08-03 16:42  

#8  All I could think of was the team of ER Dr.s. You know, going all Chef from Apocalypse Now after the tiger event with the crew holding him down in the rain. Never get off the boat, man.
Posted by: Cesare   2024-08-03 10:46  

#7  I unfortunately saw it yesterday. It's not any better today.
"Is that an eel in your pants or are you just glad to see me?"
Posted by: Deacon Blues   2024-08-03 09:29  

#6  ^^ Yeah and I have the 'Old Man Procedure' coming up soon.

At least the kid didn't have to go through the 'prep' for his. That's the worst part.
Posted by: Mullah Richard   2024-08-03 08:32  

#5  I probably could have made it through today without seeing this. ;)

Mike
Posted by: MikeKozlowski   2024-08-03 05:48  

#4  
Roto Rooter
Posted by: NN2N1   2024-08-03 05:13  

#3  Darwin rules!
Posted by: Grom the Reflective   2024-08-03 02:34  

#2  I doubt he’ll do that again. Or maybe he will, with a bigger eel. Time will tell.
Posted by: Ululating Platypus    2024-08-03 01:52  

#1  
Posted by: Skidmark   2024-08-03 00:08  

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